Buckethead has finished his five part series on going to space over at the Ministry of Minor Perfidy. Great stuff. Bravo!!!

Posted by: Ted at 06:52 AM | category: Space Program
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And guys love women with guitars. Porn star Jenna Jamison is the new spokesmodel for Jackson Guitars. These pictures are nice because even if you're not an axe freak you can enjoy them. Nothing dirty here, just a beautiful girl and her beautiful guitar.

This heads up courtesy of Fleshbot (not work safe).

Posted by: Ted at 07:53 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Some folks will never forget where they were when they heard that JFK had been shot. I remember every second of my morning at work when the shuttle Challenger tragedy happened. I also vividly recall where I was when I found out that John Belushi had died. Everyone has different events that touched them in deeply personal ways.

This story is about my most memorable 'where were you' moment. It actually has a happy ending, although it was by no means a sure thing at the time.

It was the early 1980's, and my best friend Paul and I were on leave from the Air Force. We'd gone to his hometown in southeastern Minnesota - near Mankato, Little House on the Prairie country - for R&R. We'd spent this particular day road drinking, at least that's what I call it. Basically, we were out running around to all the various small towns dotting the area, visiting his old friends and stopping for a beer at every bar we happened across.

In one town (Blue Earth? Good Thunder?), we stopped at this little hole-in-the-wall biker bar, obvious from the line of dusty Harley's parked out front. We walked in and went to the bar and ordered beer. There were 8 or 10 people in the place, and they all looked like stereotypical bikers. We were getting a pretty good looking over because, well, with our military haircuts we didn't exactly blend in. Drinking our beer, I glanced up at the TV going in the corner and asked the bartender to turn it up.

President Reagan had been shot. Attempted assassination. He was conscious, and was heading into surgery.

Paul and I bought a round for the whole bar, and as all these bikers came up to see what was going on, Paul lifted his shot and said "To the President". I echoed him, and then so did every biker.

I'll never forget that moment.

Posted by: Ted at 07:20 AM | category: Boring Stories
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Google says it too!

Posted by: Ted at 07:12 AM | category: Square Pegs
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This is too funny!!! And it's just what you get for getting Mookie grounded.

Thanks to Phillip Coons for the pointer.

(warning: first link expires in 14 days)

Posted by: Ted at 11:31 AM | category: Links
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Make my funk the P-funk.

I want my funk uncut.

Make my funk the P-funk.

I wants to get funked up.



-- Parliament

Live Free and Wax Funky.

Posted by: Ted at 08:22 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 You wants the bomb? You wants the P-funk. You Don't want your funk stepped on. (so we'll) make your funk the P-funk, 'fore you can bring it home.

Does this mean you think you're chocolate coated, freaky & habit forming? So groovy that even you dig you?

Ah, George Clinton came from a town about 30 miles north of where I grew up. In fact my dad's side of the family came from there. & if you ever tried the barbecue they have up that way, you'd understand what put the glide in his stride, the dip in his hip & made him welcome on board the mothership.

But to get deep on ya, tell me if you recognize the following:

1: Swing down sweet chariot stop & - let me ride.

2: To each his reach & if I don't cop it ain't mine to have...

3: ...don't be surprised if Ali's in the White House; Revereand Ike secretary of the treasure...

4: The bigger the headache the bigger the pill

& Next week if you're tired of the cosmic slope, can we do Mother's Finest?

Posted by: Publicola at January 21, 2004 07:41 PM (Aao25)

2 Dude, you have it in ya!

Let's see now... (Google is my friend, and that's the only way I'd get these)

1. Elvis Presley did this, and Dr Dre used the line in a chorus of one of his songs, but I'll bet you're thinking about Chaka Khan.

2. Chocolate City. I might recognize this one if I heard it, but the title isn't ringing any bells.

3. No idea.

4. This one I remember. Dr. Funkentstein? According to the search, Parliament did it, someone seems to think The Gap Band did too, and Ice Cube paraphrased it in 1991.

I bow down before your prowess in things funk.

Posted by: Ted at January 22, 2004 02:03 PM (blNMI)

3 With 40,000 watts of P-Funk power, the envelope please.....

1) The Mothership Connection (Star Child)

2)Chocolate City

3)Ditto. Gainin' on ya!

4)Funkentelechy vs. the Placebo Syndrome-- pay attention, because you can't afford free speech!

Hope that blows the cobwebs out ya mind!

Posted by: Johno at January 22, 2004 02:32 PM (b5RtV)

4 Ted,
Might I suggest Uncut Funk > The Bomb? It's a collection of Parliament's greatest hits.

For #1, you're getting it confused with swing low sweet chariot, which elvis did among other old gospel tunes.

Dre used the P-funk version, not the gospel version if I recall correctly.

You got #2 correct

No 4 - The Gap Band did use it. The Gap Band used a few of P-Funk's phrases, or perhaps vice versa.

Keep in mind though that Clinton (the good one, not Bill) used a very unique dialect when he was composing this stuff. I played a lot of P-Funk in the south (when I was a full time musician) & for some reason most bands had me sit down & write out the lyrics for the vocalists. It's really like Rev. Ike meets Mother Goose meets Socrates. Deep, witty, catchy enough for youngin's & damn if it ain't set to a groove. Funk isn't as popular a genre, at leats not out here in Co. but it has some virtues that deserve more attention than some other more popular genres.

Johno,
You Funkateer you. Is that you breathing down my neck? You defintely didn't trade your funk for what's behind the 3rd door.

No. 4 though - you gave the name of the album. Which is not without merit as it caused me to break it out. I'm listening to the Sir Nose De'VoidofFunk right now. Ahhh, the groove.

The correct answer is Funkentelechy, though I seem to recall it making a brief appearence in some other P-funk tune.

But you know how the game is played: heads I win, tails you lose.

Posted by: Publicola at January 25, 2004 01:15 PM (Aao25)

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This is a test, because so far not one darn thing will actually post... I'm getting 'server timeout messages'.

Update: Ka-wham! The bit I've been trying to post just showed up with this one, but none of the pinging happened.

Posted by: Ted at 07:33 AM | category: Square Pegs
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This special Rocketing edition is brought to you by people on the move. Specifically:

annika - who never capitalizes her name and has chosen to become a Munuvian. Yay!

Sarah - who does capitalize, is Trying to Grok and is also warmly welcomed into the Munuvian fold. Yay!

Jon of QandO, who has not only moved, but added a second blogger, one McQ. I assume that this is not a Beeblebroxian development.

Finally (as in "this is the last one", not "it's about damn time"), the Happy Furry Puppy Story Timelessness of Norbizness now has his own domain.

Much adjusteth of blogrolls should commence.

All righty. Now that the general housekeeping is out of the way, let's go look around, eh? It's freakin' cold out, and that means my hibernation instinct is at war with my inner-Canadian. Conflict: sleep now vs drinking to unconsciousness.

Roberto of DynamoBuzz fame follows the most underreported political story of the campaign (so far). That's right, the eBay auction of General Wesley Clark's sweater. I will not make fun of it, because the proceeds go to a veteran's group, which is a very good thing. Instead, I'll mention that in the comments Roberto and yours truly swap 'pocket protector' stories. I definitely come out ahead in that exchange.

Starhawk and Serenity both link to pictures of a rock in Iowa. Not the one around Dean's neck, but this one. (Serenity, your permalink for that post wouldn't work for me)

As usual, Ghost of a flea provides countless diversions and interesting posts. Being the shallow 'ooo-look-at-the-pretty-pictures' type, I'll mention Eyeball, which is a collection of aerial photographs (and detailed maps) of American landmarks. But there's much more to see when you visit the flea.

And I'm a poet, and don't I know it.

Did I mention I'm really cold?

I've decided that the next time I want to bet on something, I'll ask JimiLove, and then bet the opposite.

The Meatriarch always has insightful and thought-provoking things to say which is why I wait for the movie, and these days are no different. He makes valid points for why we as a community (the blogosphere) should be branching out beyond our narrow borders and making ourselves heard on the outside. He also talks about great barbeque, dog breeds (not for barbeque), and other diverse topics to entertain and inform. He's also Canadian, but probably posts before doing most of his drinking because he's usually coherent.

I give this guy a hard time, mainly because he deserves it. To his credit, he's never threatened me. This go-round, he points the way to a nifty little site where you can have your very own crappy handwriting converted into a font. How cool is that?

"OTA OK". Ever get one of those on your mobile phone? Petrilli did and tracked down why. Apparently it's not an uncommon thing.

It's been awhile since I've done the synergist bit, but these two adjacent stories at Phillip Coons' place just beg for it:

Running mate rumor

Dick Cheney will step down as VP candidate and the likely replacement is Giuliani.

Sara Lee Drops Jimmy Dean as Sausage Spokesman

So, Giuliani (or Condi Rice according to some) becomes VP candidate, Cheney gets his folksy on by selling us processed pork (big change there, eh?), and Jimmy Dean... Well, it takes all kinds of critters to make Farmer Vincent fritters. See how easy that is?

There isn't one single thing worth linking to over at Sanity's Edge. Read everything, because Paul is on a roll, and it's all funny.

Say Uncle leads the way to a report via Publicola that a pro-Kucinich Site had some... er... issues with some graphics they ripped off linked to. Actually, the pro-K folks (not to be confused with pre-K) were blissfully unaware of the link switcheroo that was (justifiably) done to their targets.

SilverBlue, because I haven't lately. Tink for the same reason. I enjoy my daily visits to both.

And a quick rundown on those newly added but currently unalphabetized on my blogroll. What exactly does it mean to be so mis-filed? Not a thing, except that I haven't gotten around to it yet. They may or may not consider being mentioned by me an honor, I'm afraid to ask.

California Yankee - I grew up in the Bay Area, and this name just seems wrong, like being a New York Gia... nevermind.
GDay Mate - from Oz. Not the halucinegenic poppy-filled Oz, the other one.
SpankysPlace - Even the staff doesn't like being at the Emergency Room.
J-Walk Blog - Where Glenn often gets his inspiration.
Symphony X - Culture, classical music and art. Lynn and Daniel both linked to this site recently.
The Eternal Golden Braid - An emphasis on space and technology.
Dustbury - I don't have a handle on this one yet, having just started reading there. But he's nice to Mookie, and that counts for something right up front.

I'm still cold.

Posted by: Ted at 06:13 AM | category: Links
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1 I STILL haven't received my latest Walter Giardino fan club newsletter!

Posted by: Rob @ L&R at January 21, 2004 10:00 AM (cudbX)

2 IM A LITTLE BIT BEHIND GETTING IT DONE SO YOU SHUT UP YOU YOU DONT KNOW ANYTHING YOU ARE SO DUMBHEAD YOU DONT KNOW ANYTHING.

Yuor friend in fandom,
Ted (Waltermania - Pres.)

Posted by: Ted at January 21, 2004 10:37 AM (blNMI)

3 that hurt.

Posted by: jim at January 21, 2004 12:25 PM (zE10C)

4 Thanks Ted! I enjoy reading you too.

My office is cold too.

Posted by: Tink at January 21, 2004 06:35 PM (Pp0b1)

5 Jim, my prediction skills aren't much better. If I were a gambling man, I'd be homeless for sure.

Posted by: Ted at January 22, 2004 07:49 AM (blNMI)

6 I don't drink. But I do have a drink named after me.

Posted by: The Meatriarchy at January 27, 2004 10:03 PM (x3H0D)

7 Yay! Thanks for the shout, Ted. Actually it's Pixy who capitalized my name. Any thoughts on how to change it to lower case in MT?

Posted by: annika at January 28, 2004 12:06 PM (zAOEU)

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Today is Liz's first day back at work after her long vacation. She didn't want to go. Ahhhh, normalcy prevails.

Posted by: Ted at 01:48 PM | category: Seriously
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1

Posted by: Pixy Misa at January 20, 2004 09:44 PM (kOqZ6)

2 yay!

Betcha she comes home wanting to never go back to work again

Posted by: Victor at January 21, 2004 12:18 PM (L3qPK)

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*Who is now happily married and no longer fits this category.**

**As far as I know.***

***Thanks to Tiger for the spare footnotes.

Picture found at and all credit due to the always hilarious Curmudgeonly & Skeptical.

Posted by: Ted at 10:45 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Over at Backstage, Tim is under tremendous pressure with work schedules, and then he has a chance encounter with a couple of environmentalists:

So I asked them, very politely at that, if they had ever spent much time working in a forest... The response I received apart from the icy stares was that they were serious campers... It was at this point that I laughed at them, told them they needed to try working for a living, and then headed over to the bar for a refill, not to return to the table...

I suspect I've made a couple more enemies... Screw 'em... They would go crunch under the tracks of a logging crawler just like that dreaded underbrush...

He handled it well I think.

Posted by: Ted at 10:29 AM | category: Links
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Maestro Headquarters - where you can download the public version of the software that they're using to control the Spirit and Opportunity rovers on the Martian surface. Right now, the software contains the data used when scientists tested the rovers, but soon they'll be uploading the actual terrain data from Mars!

The site also has an online users manual, discussion forums, and online help.

Posted by: Ted at 07:14 AM | category: Space Program
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Another in a series of Cult Flicks and Trash Picks posts.

Riki-Oh, The Story of Ricky

A friend at work lent me this one, with plenty of warning which I'll pass along to you. This is the most violent movie I have ever seen, with the blood and gore reaching absurd levels.

Basic plot: Ricky gets sent to prison where he winds up the target of practically everyone. He wins in the end.

It takes 90 minutes to tell the tale, and along the way people are disembowelled, chopped with machetes, impaled and... jeez, I can't go on. It's that graphic. Oddly though, you tend to de-sensitize and the story is just enough to keep you watching, if for no other reason than to be able to say that you've seen it (uh, that would be me Tim). The cartoonlike quality of the acting helps with the belief suspension too, especially the characters reaction to pain. And there's plenty of pain spread around for everyone. For instance, one guy is ripped open, and with his dying breath tries to strangle his opponent with his own entrails (I don't think so, Tim).

Anyways, I'll return it to my friend and thank him, and now I can say I've seen it. This movie is only for dedicated blood-freaks and Asian cinema devotees.

Posted by: Ted at 06:53 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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Kelley at Suburban Blight has been mixing things up lately by posting her Cul de Sac's at irregular intervals and there's a new one up now. I must be livin' right, because my timing was good enough to be included.

Posted by: Ted at 08:37 PM | category: Links
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Yep, that's me. Honesty compels me to admit that I did once have a letter published in Penthouse. Because of the younger and/or more sensitive folks who visit and read, I've put the text of my letter into the extended entry. more...

Posted by: Ted at 01:02 PM | category: Boring Stories
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This recipe is kinda special to me, because it's one that my mom used to make when I was growing up. I didn't get the recipe from her, because she was a 'dump and taste' type of cook and never wrote anything down. Mom called it chili, and I suppose it's what an Iowa farm girl would think of as chili.

Five years ago mom passed away and my wife and I went home for the funeral. As they do, friends brought over casseroles and easy dinners, and I was delighted when one of the neighbors brought over a big pot of this chili I remembered so well. She had gotten my mom to show her how to make it, and gave me the recipe. I call it California Chili, because that's what mom called it

California Chili

2 Tbsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
2 cloves garlic, crushed
1/2 green pepper, diced
1 lb. ground beef
1 large can peeled and diced tomatoes
1 can tomato soup
2 cans red kidney beans
1 can chili without beans
chili powder to taste (~2 Tbsp)
salt & pepper to taste

1. Saute the onion and green pepper in olive oil until tender, add the garlic in the last minute of cooking.
2. In a soup pot, brown the ground beef. Drain. Add the saute'd mixture and all of the remaining ingredients. Rinse each can with 1/2 cup of water and add to the pot.
3. Bring to a boil. Reduce heat and simmer for 20-30 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Posted by: Ted at 12:45 PM | category: Recipes
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This is a series of posts where weÂ’re building a basic model rocket online. Each post shows part of the process step by step, including pictures and passing along tips and tricks IÂ’ve learned along the way. You can find the rest of the series here. To learn more about what model rocketry is about, see this Q&A.

The main part of the post is in the extended entry so you donÂ’t have to deal with it if you donÂ’t want to, but I hope you follow along because when we get done youÂ’ll have built and flown your first model rocket. Questions asked from before are answered too. more...

Posted by: Ted at 10:26 AM | category: Build It
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1. What in the world is that logo along either sideline of the Patriots field? It's a subdued gray-blue and looks like a stylized volcano or hands reaching up. Any idea?

2. Could someone in the New England area please Please PLEASE wait at the airport and kill make mute Phil Simms before he can broadcast again? If killing is too extreme, I'd settle for removal of his vocal cords. By the fourth quarter the play-by-play guy (Gumbel) has to fight to get a word in edgewise as Simms rambles on and on and on.

Update: Hmmm, Tiger brings up a good point. In today's world, hyperbole isn't always acceptable. So for the record, I don't advocate the actual murder of anyone, even someone as annoying as Phil Simms (or Chris Collinsworth for that matter). It was a rant, ok? Anti-Nike: Don't do it.

Posted by: Ted at 05:52 PM | category: Square Pegs
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According to media sources, President Bush's vision for space hasn't fired the imagination of the people. I'm not so sure about that. Look around the blogosphere and you'll see plenty of mention about it, and everywhere you look in mainstream media there's a related story. I think for now it's a quiet buzz, as if people are toying with the idea in their mind, and discussing it around the water cooler.

Have you noticed how little we're hearing about how there are no real benefits to going? If NASA has done one thing right, it's been getting the word out (again, quietly but pervasively) that we've gotten a lot of everyday technology back from our space program. People today do realize that there is a return to the money spent on space, and I'm not talking just about Space Food Sticks.

Mala of Wrong Side of Happiness has an impressive list of them, plus this link to even more (.pdf document). A good point is made in her comments that being associated with the space program doesn't neccessarily mean that it was directly invented by or for. A lot of basic technology is discovered but has no immediate practical application, and the space program has excelled in taking these little bits of existing science and finding real-life uses for them, which then make their way into everyday life.

Major thanks to fellow Munuvian Victor for passing along the link to Mala's blog.

Over at The Ministry of Minor Perfidy, the inaptly named Buckethead is doing a great series of posts on space exploration. I particularly like this idea:

To prepare for the Mars mission, we should have some experience with long duration flights. We can do a dress rehearsal of the Mars mission by mounting an expedition to one of the Near Earth Asteroids. These asteroids are small bodies of rock or metal that have orbits that cross EarthÂ’s. Some of these asteroids are very close to Earth, at least in terms of how much fuel we need to burn to get to them. Rather than a three-year mission to Mars, we can plan a one-year mission to an asteroid.

And you can bet that someone will figure out a way to make a buck with said asteroid, which means someone with vision in private industry will want to go back. And that's how the process gets kick-started again, this time with less government.

Finally, Chirs Hall pointed out these two fine space related sites:

A space blog, The Eternal Golden Braid.

Also, Sylvia Engdahl's Space Subsite.

Many thanks Amigo!

Posted by: Ted at 09:19 AM | category: Space Program
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I know lots of people do the Friday Five. This week I saw (among others) Tink and Dawn answer, and one question in particular jumped out at me.

4. Have you received any gifts with messages engraved upon them? What did the inscription say?

When I was stationed in Germany, I was in charge of a wonderful group of people. These men and women were the type you could give instructions to, then leave alone knowing that they would get the job done. I was very protective of them because they made me look good.

Occasionally, one of my people would be on the phone getting frustrated with a nitwit-du-jour, and because of the nature of our work, it was usually someone of higher rank. If it went far enough that I needed to get involved, I'd say "Let me talk to that twinkie."

When I left that assignment, my people gave me a beautiful plaque (it's hanging above my desk right now) that has this inscription:

Posted by: Ted at 07:27 AM | category: Boring Stories
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1 "Don't let the twinkies get you."

In gay-speak, that has a TOTALLY different meaning.

Posted by: Dawn at January 19, 2004 12:56 AM (LD0tK)

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