Steve the Llamabutcher says in my comments:

"A motto to live by--if only babel fish could translate into latin!"

So "It may suck, but it's my suck" translates into (drumroll please):

Translation courtesy of Sunsite and their java-based Latin-English/English-Latin translator. Any and all mangling of grammar is purely my fault (where's John Cleese when you really need him?). Automatically majestic just for being latin.

It reminds me of a bit I saw Buddy Hackett do, where he visited the Pope and asked some embarrassing question. And the Pope replied "Abscondi Obesii Illegitimo", which translates to "Get outta here, you fat bastard".

And I'd be remiss without mentioning Anonymous Kyle and his comment. You have too much time on your hands, amigo. Go count something.

Posted by: Ted at 05:50 PM | category: Links
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Thanks to the Carolina rocket guys for the heads up to this "Inside tour of an operating Rolls Royce jet engine". In fact, I'm just going to quote Bill S:

Yes, this is off topic but most of this crowd will find it cool to watch.....there is most definitely combustion and thrust! :-)

This is a seriously cool shockwave flash animation. Whomever put this together deserved their pay.

Keep an eye on the right side of the display to see the operating parameters at each stage, and also down on the lower right where a red bar shows where you are inside the engine. There are some text comments that flash up below the play controls.

Has sound. Low res is about 2.1Mb, hi res version is almost 5 mb, so it may take a while to load on a dial-up connection. Broad band - no problem with streaming.

Posted by: Ted at 04:36 PM | category: Links
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Rocket Jones the blog sucks lately. For many good reasons, including the new job. Even my recreational reading has been dominated by technical books. Ever relax to "An Introduction to SELinux"? Boy howdy, talk about riveting.

So I haven't had the time to devote online that I used to, and this site has inevitably suffered. I'm not apologizing, just stating the facts as I see 'em. I'm also not considering shutting down, I have too much fun with this.

I don't get to visit the places on my blogroll nearly as much as I used to, and that bites because I feel like I'm losing touch a little bit with good friends.

On the plus side, I've got a whole heap of fun movies to review, a surprise for some of you, and of course the whole Blogger Bowl 2004 league. The draft results are in, annika is trash talking (and we Raiders fans can talk some shit), and, well, let's just say that I've got some things in the works. Not earth-shaking stuff, but stuff.

In other words, keep checking back for continued blogging ala Rocket Jones. It may suck, but it's my suck.

Posted by: Ted at 06:22 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Jules Winnfield: Wanna know what I'm buyin' Ringo?
Pumpkin: What?
Jules Winnfield: Your life. I'm givin' you that money so I don't hafta kill your ass. You read the Bible?
Pumpkin: Not regularly.
Jules Winnfield: There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin' that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker before you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. Now I'm thinkin': it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. .45 here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or is could by you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that. But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin, Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.

Posted by: Anonymous Kyle...again at August 17, 2004 09:50 AM (blNMI)

2 A motto to live by--if only babel fish could translate into latin!

Posted by: Steve the Llamabutcher at August 17, 2004 01:59 PM (Q9Wgy)

3 Hooray for suckage!

Posted by: Keith at August 17, 2004 05:19 PM (jbvVc)

4 Aww...I luv ya ;-)

Posted by: Lynn at August 17, 2004 05:21 PM (eAcba)

5 Everyone's too busy to blog/read these days (except for my employers, who have suddenly managed to read every last one of my pages in the past two days). I may find myself with a LOT of time to read blogs more regularly pretty soon!

Posted by: dawn at August 19, 2004 09:08 PM (Zgn4s)

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An artist friend of mine was inspired by one of my rockets to paint his PC case and monitor (not the screen part, silly) with that fleckstone spray paint. It looks like something out of the Flintstones. Pretty cool.

On the internet, I've seen PC cases constructed out of clear plexiglass, out of lego and other interesting materials. My dad used to build 'executive' PC cases out of cherry, oak and mahogany for HP, but this case is a true work of art, and I want one sooooo bad.

Many thanks to the Flea Ethereal for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 06:05 AM | category: Links
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"Klaatu Barada Nikto."

-- The Day the Earth Stood Still

-- Bruce Campbell vs. Army of Darkness

Posted by: Ted at 05:11 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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Wegglywoo adds still another international flavor to the official Rocket Jones Blogger Bowl 2004 cheerleading squad. She asked, I invited, and that's all it takes.

Stevie, of Caught In The XFire!
Emma, of Miss Apropos!
Lynn S., of Reflections in d minor!
Heather, of Angelweave!
Kat, of Mostly Fluff!
Nic, of Shoes, Ships, and Sealing Wax!
Susie, of Practical Penumbra!
Mookie, of MookieRiffic!
Helen, of Everyday Stranger!
Gir, of Your Moosey Fate!
Tink, of Flitting Here and There!
Sarah, of Trying To Grok!
Blogoline, of Blogoline's Journal!
LeeAnn, of The Cheese Stands Alone!
Denita, of Who Tends The Fires!
Jennifer, of Jennifer's History and Stuff!
Cindy, of Squipper!
Lemur Girl, of... uh, Lemur Girl!
Dawn of Caterwauling!
Big Hair, of Left & Right!

Posted by: Ted at 09:51 AM | category: Links
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I bet the major PC companies are looking over their shoulders these days.

Posted by: Ted at 09:28 AM | category: Links
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The schedule is up, and I see that my very first opponent is the lovely annika.

I should have some sort of special cheer or something here, just for her. Remember high school, when you "Clipped the Cardinals" or "Defused the Bombers" or whatever?

Anyway, I consider her the primary threat in the league right up front, because she actually does research and stuff before the draft. If I can whup her early on, before injuries become a factor, then I'll know the Rockets have good juju.

Her team doesn't really have a name, since she followed instructions (unlike yours truly) and signed up with her blog name.

Spank the annikas Poets?

Posted by: Ted at 04:50 PM | category: Links
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1 Hey Ted, did you check out the draft results?

Just win babeeeee!

Posted by: annika at August 17, 2004 03:18 AM (jIr0u)

2 i looked at your draft Ted. Thanks for stealing my kicker. i had Vanderjagt ranked high, i thought. Nice job drawing Baltimore's D, too, you big meanie.

But how you gonna beat Clinton Portis? Huh? and as for the WR position, i got two things to say to ya:

...Marvin

Harrison...

:O

Posted by: annika at August 17, 2004 03:41 AM (jIr0u)

3 I realize I'm weighing in on this rather late, & honestly I don't follow team sports enough to give any insight on the particulars, but Ted I do have some advice for you:

"Spank the annikas Poets?"

Pick another verb. That's because A: she might like it rather than be deterred by it B: you will like it & C: everyone not involved in the proposed spanking will be jealous, including the lovely Mrs. Rocketjones.

So maybe whoop the .. no, that won't work.
How about pat the.. nah, ...
Maybe saying the annika/poets suc... er, cross off that one...
Perhaps slap the... no, either one of y'all might be that kinky...
Possibly blow the... nope - on second thought even I ain't touching that one.
Maybe you should just say you think you'll be victorious - no wait, someone will throw in "secret' right after that.

How about just shaking hands & saying you hope the best teams wins?

Posted by: Publicola at August 17, 2004 07:55 AM (Aao25)

4 Forget the cheers. Just have your cheerleaders in short skirts, and we'll just flash 'em some boobies on cue!

Posted by: dawn at August 19, 2004 09:09 PM (Zgn4s)

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This company sells affordable video systems that you can fly in hobby rockets. If you go to this page, check out the very last movie, titled "LOC Booster Bruiser EXP-4 AMW K670 Green No Spin at all". The LOC Bruiser is a beast of a rocket about 10 feet tall and almost 8 inches in diameter, and this video is like hitching a ride.

PS. those little tiny dots are the cars of the folks at the launch.

Posted by: Ted at 07:48 PM | category: Rocketry
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A few weeks ago I mentioned a successful experiment involving a grilled pear. Since pears are my favorite fruit (or maybe second after apricots, depends on the day), I decided to experiment again last night, and came up with this side dish that goes perfectly with pork.

Sweet and Savory on the Side

3 pears (not too ripe, you want them firm)
1 small onion
2 Tbsp butter or light olive oil
1-2 tsp of fresh ground ginger
fresh ground black pepper

You can peel the pears if you want, I didn't. Quarter and core them, then cut the quarters into slices the long way about 1/4" thick.

Slice the onion into 1/4" slices, then cut in half.

Melt 1 Tbsp butter (or a little olive oil) in a frying pan on medium heat. Add the onion and saute until the onions are translucent - 4 or 5 minutes. When done, remove the onions from the pan and set them aside.

Melt the rest of the butter in the pan (or add a little more olive oil) and saute the pears just until soft, turning occasionally. You don't want the pears mushy, so don't overcook.

Add the onions back to the pan and stir together to combine with the pears. Grate the fresh ginger over the top and cook for another minute or two, turning two or three times to mix the flavors.

When done, top with a generous amount of black pepper. Serves 4.

Posted by: Ted at 07:40 AM | category: Recipes
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So the governor of New Jersey, McGreevey (or however you spell it) has resigned and admitted that he's gay.

The cynic in me is screaming that this 'gay' thing is an attempt to deflect attention from the fact that he's being hammered from all sides by scandals and possible investigations.

He's a politician, and a pretty good one since you don't get to be governor without some skills. That doesn't change the fact that he's also (allegedly) a crooked scumbag. Cheat on your wife? Shameful, but personal business. Gay? So what, but having a couple kids with your wife makes me think the term you're searching for is "bisexual".

Then again, I think "gay" might be exactly the term you intended, playing for sympathy and simultaneously using it as a smokescreen.

For excellent coverage of New Jersey matters, go visit Roberto at DynamoBuzz.

Posted by: Ted at 07:17 AM | category: Links
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As long as she's not listening too carefully, you might just get away with it.

Shakespearean Sonnets for Every Occasion

Posted by: Ted at 11:08 AM | category: Links
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I've just started going through this archive of Sports Franchise logos, but so far I'm loving it.*

Thanks to Off Wing Opinion for pointing this out.

*That slogan is about as close to McDonalds as I get these days. *sigh*

Posted by: Ted at 07:49 AM | category: Links
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It's been awhile since I've posted a love song to my beloved. She doesn't read Rocket Jones, but word gets back to her.

Dust On The Bottle
(David Lee Murphy/Jimbeau Hinson)

Creole Williams lived down a dirt road
Made homemade wine like nobody I know
Dropped by one Friday night and said can you help me Creole
Got a little girl waitin' on me and I wanna treat her right

I got what you need son, it's sittin down in the cellar
He reached through the cobwebs as he turned on the light and said

There might be a little dust on the bottle
But don't let it fool ya about what's inside
There might be a little dust on the bottle
It's one of those things that gets sweeter with time

She was sittin in the porch swing as I pulled up the driveway
My ole heart was racing as she climbed inside
She slid over real close and drove down to the lake road
Watched the sun fade in that big red sky

I reached under the front seat and said, now here's something special
It's just been waiting for a night like tonight

There might be a little dust on the bottle
But don't let it fool ya about what's inside
There might be a little dust on the bottle
It's one of those things that gets sweeter with time

You're still with me, and we've made some memories
After all these years theres one thing I've found
Some say good love, well it's like a fine wine
It keeps getting better as the days go by

There might be a little dust on the bottle
But don't let it fool ya about what's inside
There might be a little dust on the bottle
It's one of those things that gets sweeter with time

Posted by: Ted at 06:10 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Great song!

I'd like to have someone to sing/post a song like that to. You must be a lucky guy.

Posted by: GEBIV at August 12, 2004 08:39 PM (/xqbY)

2 What GEBIV said.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 12, 2004 11:30 PM (8Chfh)

3 I am lucky, and I know it.

Posted by: Ted at August 13, 2004 11:45 AM (blNMI)

4 yea...dust on the bottle is an awesome song, makes me think of my special someone everytime

Posted by: justin at June 20, 2005 07:22 AM (1mnTr)

5 I love that song. It used to be my boyfriends song to me before we went our seperate ways.

Posted by: Kayla at August 02, 2005 12:49 PM (Yl0BJ)

6 I've loved that song ever since I was little!!!It jus amases me that someone could write something that awsome.

Posted by: Yama at August 29, 2005 06:29 PM (EhjnY)

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Denmark has forbidden Kellogg's from adding vitamins and minerals to the breakfast cereals sold in that country.

They claim the additions result in "toxic doses" which could harm children and unborn children. Kellogg's additions include 17% of the US recommended daily requirements calcium and iron, and 25% of vitamins B6 and folic acid. Denmark does not have recommended daily allowances of nutrients.

Rather than turn this into some dark anti-American conspiracy, I'll believe the simpler explanation. The Danish government are idiots. Probably not enough vitamins in their diet growing up.

Posted by: Ted at 06:08 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I first posted about the Flugtag '88 Airshow disaster almost eleven months ago, and since then there have been several comments posted and I've received some email from people who were there. I extend my sincere thanks to all who shared their stories.

The most recent commenter is Tricia, who also happens to be a blogger (I'll be adding her to the blogroll). Tricia's recollections are vivid and compelling and I'll admit that I had tears in my eyes as I read them.

If you're not sure what this is all about, look here. It's probably better if you start at the bottom and work your way up. Be sure to read the comments posted as well.

Posted by: Ted at 05:57 AM | category: Links
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Yesterday I had a complete physical because I'll be 45 years old soon. My last checkup happened when I turned 40, and isn't what the title of this post is about. According to the official doctor scale, I am now under 300 pounds and have lost 40 pounds since the first of the year. I'd hit that plateau and hadn't lost anything for a while, but just kept up the diet and it looks like I'm dropping the pounds again. The doctor agreed with me when I said my goal is 220, which is higher than the 'recommended' but reasonable for my build.

As for my condition, I am disgustingly healthy despite myself, with good blood pressure. Blood work will be done saturday at the lab, mainly for a diabetes check, count the cholesterol (should be fine), and whatever else they look for (mad cow?).

Here's a tip for you Bill: find a pretty lady doctor with small hands. That part of the exam isn't any more fun than before, but you can pretend it's foreplay.

Posted by: Ted at 05:38 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Everyone, and I mean both sides, claim the media is biased against them. Gee, I wonder whatever could they mean?

Check out this headline from the AP:

AP: U.S. Didn't Warn Las Vegas of Threats

Wow. Reading on:

When the Justice Department obtained two videos suggesting terrorists had cased Las Vegas casinos, the discussions didn't center on public alerts or heightened security. Rather, authorities worried about the effects on tourism and the casinos' legal liabilities, internal memos show.

There's more!

Though the FBI offered, most local law enforcement and casino security officers declined an invitation to view the footage after it was obtained in 2002

One document obtained by The Associated Press quotes a federal prosecutor in Las Vegas as saying the city's mayor was concerned about the "deleterious effect on the Las Vegas tourism industry" if the evidence became public. The mayor said Monday he was never told of the footage.

Another memo states the casinos didn't want to see the footage for fear it would make them more likely to be held liable in civil court if an attack occurred.

Posted by: Ted at 07:36 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Woo Hoo, a fisking from Ted!!

Tourism vs Safety is a hard wire to walk when things aren't all that clear. I'm not sure I'd come down so hard on the, basically, foggy. Then again, y' don't wanna look like Larry Vaughn: Mayor of Shark City.

(Yeah, yeah, all my worldview is filtered through the shootimg script of JAWS, I know...)

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 10, 2004 10:42 PM (LaDCa)

2 I'm not much of a fisker. My first attempt (long long ago) was pretty embarrassing. This one just pissed me off because it was so blatent.

Posted by: Ted at August 11, 2004 06:24 AM (blNMI)

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Testing Meme Propagation In Blogspace: Add Your Blog

This posting is a community experiment that tests how a meme, represented by this blog posting, spreads across blogspace, physical space and time. It will help to show how ideas travel across blogs in space and time and how blogs are connected. It may also help to show which blogs (and aggregation sites) are most influential in the propagation of memes. The dataset from this experiment will be public, and can be located via Google (or Technorati) by doing a search for the GUID for this meme (below).

Please join the test by adding your blog (see instructions, below) and inviting your friends to participate—the more the better. The data from this test will be public and open; others may use it to visualize and study the connectedness of blogspace and the propagation of memes across blogs.

The GUID for this experiment is:

as098398298250swg9e98929872525389t9987898tq98wteqtgaq62010920352598gawst

The above GUID enables anyone to easily search Google or other search engines for all blogs that participate in this experiment, once they have indexed the sites that participate, which may take several days or weeks. To locate the full data set, just search for any sites that contain this GUID.

Anyone is free to analyze the data of this experiment. Please publicize your analysis of the data, and/or any comments by adding comments onto the original post (see URL above). (Note: it would be interesting to see a geographic map or a temporal animation, as well as a social network map of the propagation of this meme.)

INSTRUCTIONS

To add your blog to this experiment, copy this entire posting to your blog, and then answer the questions below, substituting your own information, below, where appropriate. Other than answering the questions below, please do not alter the information, layout or format of this post in order to preserve the integrity of the data in this experiment (this will make it easier for searchers and automated bots to find and analyze the results later).

REQUIRED FIELDS (Note: Replace the answers below with your own answers)

(1) I found this experiment at URL:
http://practicalpenumbra.mu.nu/

(2) I found it via “Newsreader Software” or “Browsing the Web” or “Searching the Web” or “An E-Mail Message”: Browsing the Web

(3) I posted this experiment at URL: http://rocketjones.mu.nu/

(4) I posted this on date (day/month/year): 10/08/04

(5) I posted this at time (24 hour time): 06:11

(6) My posting location is (city, state, country): (city), Virginia, USA

OPTIONAL SURVEY FIELDS:

(7) My blog is hosted by: mu.nu

( My age is: 44

(9) My gender is: Male

(10) My occupation is: Computer Consultant

(11) I use the following RSS/Atom reader software: none

(12) I use the following software to post to my blog: MovableType

(13) I have been blogging since (day, month, year): 04/07/2003

(14) My web browser is: MS IE

(15) My operating systems are: Windows ME

Posted by: Ted at 06:35 AM | category: Links
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From Off Wing Opinion:

The OSHL will teams in six Canadians cities- Halifax, Quebec City, London, Hamilton, Toronto and Kitchener- and will have a unique format. The season will be comprised of four 11-day tournaments each comprised of a round-robin and a playoff. Each game will also include a shootout which won't decide the outcome of the game but will contribute to points in the standings- wins will be worth three points, shootout wins worth two, making each game worth five points that can be split between the teams. Each team will have a roster of 12 skaters, including the goalie, who will play three 17 minute periods of 4-on-4 hockey.

all penalties will result in penalty shots

Posted by: Ted at 06:19 AM | category: Links
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