But you can, if you head over to Joe Horror and read the latest movie reviews. My contributions this week are The Ryli Morgan Collection (for you indie movie lovers), and Hot Wax: Zombies on Wheels.

Posted by: Ted at 05:13 AM | category: Links
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Yesterday was our regularly scheduled rocket club launch out at Great Meadow. Besides the usual sport launching (for fun), there was a regional contest event scheduled and the sky was full of rocket gliders, helicopter recovery rockets and more.

I almost didn't go because I'd worked for most of the week on converting one of my high power rockets for hybrid-engine flight. On Friday night about 10pm I ran into "one more problem" and got frustrated. Rather than try to force things, I just decided to not take anything but small model rockets to the launch. Even then, the weather forecast called for pretty stiff winds and I'd heard that there were several cub scout packs due to attend. Not conducive to improving my mood.

What the heck, I went anyway. The winds were brisk, but not insurmountable, the hordes of cub scouts didn't materialize (or they were the smallest horde on the planet), and I had a good time.

Two other rocket-bloggers were there. Dick Stafford flew his usual assortment of unusual rockets, including his legendary "hat of death", his too-new-to-be-legendary-yet "Yamikazi" and a couple of models made completely out of folded paper. Rich (of Vertical Force Rocketry) was there with his family. Hopefully he'll make it out to the launches a little more often this year. It was good to see them again.

There were several high-power flights made, and towards the end of the afternoon a wedding was taking place up the hill at the Summer House. We all got a chuckle after one particularly roaring flight, when we could hear the wedding guests do a collective "holy shit!" Someone imagined that the Bride's mother was probably having a conniption over our activities, and I impersonated the Groom at the alter: "Whoa... huh? Oh yeah, I do."

I remembered the sunblock, stayed hydrated, flew streamers for recovery because of the wind (and still had long walks to recover most everything), and worked a couple of hours as safety check-in dude. As usual, it was big fun.

Here's what I flew:

1. Vampyre - A10-3T - Original design ringfin. Perfection.

2. YJ-113 - A10-3T - This little beastie is a downscale of the Estes Yellow Jacket, and it's about 7" tall. My Level 2 certification rocket is an upscaled version of this same rocket, about 7' tall. Like all Yellow Jackets, there is a tendency to severely over-engine the rocket and this time was no exception. I didn't have a 1/2A engine so I went for the full A and almost lost it due to extreme speed and altitude. I love this design.

3. Groove Tube - C6-5 - Centuri classic tubefin design from the 70's. Big motor, recovered on twin streamers because of the wind, but still had a long walk because of the drift. With all those tube fins, she gets her nose into the wind and acts like a glider.

4. Zen Doggie - B6-4 x3 - I haven't flown this rocket a whole lot over the years because it is sometimes marginally stable. The fins are rather small, and there is a gap between the front fins and rear fins. It looks cool, but I suspect that the gap is causing the air to be too turbulent over the rear fins to be useful, which makes the rocket squirrelly and not too safe. Couple that to the fact that it's a three-engine cluster, and there's a whole lot of weight at the back end, which is exactly where you don't want it. I've added nose-weight and tweaked the design some, and today I decided to try something different. I put a layer of masking tape between the two sets of fins, effectively turning them into one fin surface, thinking that it might solve the stability problem. Oh yeah. The flight was perfectly straight, so I'll be making this a permanent mod. Rich had a great idea about using clear plastic packing tape, so the fins still look split, but behave like a single fin.

5. Sparrow - A10-3T - This was my original "born-again rocketeer" rocket, and I fly it once a year just for old time's sake. It's a tiny Estes kit and it's battered and worn, but she made yet another flight without falling to pieces.

6. DTR-1 - B6-6 - Great flight from this original six-fin design.

7. Dynamic Carrier - B4-4 - I've done this cool Custom Rockets kit up as an alien space ship. She looks great and flies great too. Perfect recovery.

8. Saturn III - A10-3T x4 - four-engined original design, it looks Saturn-ish. All four motors lit, and at ejection it sounds like popcorn as all the ejection charges go off within a split second of each other. Great flight, long drift again.

That was it for me. No damaged rockets, no lost rockets, no sunburn. Good day.

Posted by: Ted at 07:30 AM | category: Rocketry
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1 I couldn't stay long cause the kids get restless. Plus, other than the 1 reload I had for the Mustang I forgot a whole box of stuff that I needed

Posted by: Maelstrom at June 11, 2007 12:38 PM (V0o94)

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Vampires prey upon humans because they need our blood as sustenance. Mummies animate to fulfill dire prophesies on those who ignore the warning curse. Even Godzilla and his cousins leave mankind alone until someone or something causes them to open yet another can of whoopass on poor Tokyo.

Werewolves kill for pleasure. That right there is what makes werewolves so frightening.

Ginger Snaps (2000) is a werewolf movie with an original spin on the mythos. As I tend to do, I'm going to review this movie as entertainment and not dig too deeply into symbolism and philosophical meaning and such. If you're into that sort of thing, then the reviews are out there that will tell you about how the lycanthropic conversion is a metaphore for puberty and all that crap. I'm a simple man enjoying simple pleasures.

The initial scenes highlight that the story takes place in a sort of planned suburban community, and you get the feeling that they're a little isolated and in a sense even a little inbred. I grew up in a similar environment, where the folks living there tend to know everyone else. You all see the same people, you all do the same things and the kids all play together at the same games. The entire community focuses inward on itself.

Within the community, Ginger and Brigitte Fitzgerald are outsiders. Closer than most sisters (not *that* inbred, you perv), they're dark, morbid, and share a mocking attitude towards the "average" world around them. In other words, they're teenagers.

The people of the community are scared, in a low-key, background kind of way because something is killing pets in a horrific manner. Dogs and cats are being ripped to shreds and the news reports air constant reminders to be wary of the ferocious wild animal that is stalking the neighborhoods at night.

Late one night Ginger and Brigitte are out, hatching some half-thought-through revenge on a hated classmate. They come across yet another pet torn limb from limb and decide to get home. Just as they start back, Ginger is attacked by... something. Something big and fast and strong. Brigitte doesn't hesitate to chase the thing as it carries Ginger into a wooded area.

They manage to escape and the beast gives chase. Ginger has been badly mauled, but the girls make it to a road with the creature in close pursuit. Just after they cross the beast jumps out after them and gets splattered by a passing van.

By the time they get home, they know something is wrong because Ginger is already starting to heal. Over the next few days and weeks, it becomes apparent that Ginger is changing, and only reluctantly do the girls admit that she may be becoming a werewolf.

Through all of this, Brigitte tries to stay supportive of her sister, even as Ginger starts to become popular with the guys because she turns into an agressive slut. Both girls are confused at the changes happening in their lives, and their conflicting emotions with and towards each other drive the plot.

In the end, that's what this story is about. Two sisters, devoted to each other and how they adjust and react as they each deal with changes in their lives.

Don't get me wrong here, because this movie has buckets of blood being splashed around. There's enough gore here for the slasher fans, and it's a special treat to see the special effects being done the old fashioned way, with makeup and actors instead of computer generated stuff. The werewolf is pretty freakin' amazing to see too.

The acting is excellent all around, especially the sisters. We've all known teens like their characters, even if they weren't our friends, and the ladies nailed their performances.

This was another small-budget horror movie filmed in Canada. After I enjoyed Decoys and now Ginger Snaps, I think I'll be watching for other similiar releases in the future.

To paraphrase one of the characters in the movie, the first werewolf was splashed like roadkill by a car, so you can throw Hollywood crap like silver bullets out the window. Don't expect the "classic" werewolf mythos, but do expect to be pleasantly surprised by this excellent movie.

Posted by: Ted at 10:21 PM | category: Cult Flicks
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1 I hope to catch this movie some time. I kinda liked Ginger Snaps Back, which I think I third in the series. Not as quality a review, but I have a synopsis here: http://rocketdungeon.blogspot.com/2006/08/tgif-stew.html

PS - Hope the weather is good tomorrow

Posted by: Dick Stafford at June 09, 2007 12:32 AM (JnPUP)

2 Pardon me for being lowbrow... But you say there is plenty of blood... Howz'bout plenty of nekkidness? I enjoy by B-horror movies with plenty of both.

Posted by: The Maximum Leader at June 12, 2007 02:30 PM (iJhG9)

3 Nope, no nudity. The sisters are age 16 and 15 or somewhere in the vicinity. No older female victims that I can recall. There are a couple of underwear scenes that fit into the storyline, but this movie is good enough to not need gratuitous nudity.

Posted by: Ted at June 13, 2007 04:50 AM (blNMI)

4 Thanks for the tip. I am going to start getting some of the films you're reviewing and recommending for my own viewing pleasure...

Posted by: The Maximum Leader at June 13, 2007 11:06 AM (iJhG9)

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Over at Joe Horror, I entered a contest to write a scene from a Nazisploitation movie (a sub-genre of "women in prison" movies, the best known being Ilsa, She-Wolf of the SS). My entry was in short story format, and can be seen here. Warning: These movies are sick and chock full o' nudity, rape, torture, humiliation and so on. Needless to say, so is my story, although it is mostly implied. It begins:

Weakened and exhausted, Simone hangs from the ceiling, no longer caring that the heavy iron of the manicles [sic] cuts into the flesh around her wrists.

Anyway... I won!

I loved this comment after my story was posted:

I bet number four was written by a woman. It's well written, and seems to have a genuine feminine touch.

Posted by: Ted at 05:04 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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I want *Surface*!!!!!!!

Thanks to QandO for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 06:51 PM | category: Links
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From Grant, over at the McCovey Chronicles:

All-Time Team of Great-Named Giants Draftees:

C - Giuseppe Chiaramonte
1B - Turtle Zaun
2B - Van Fixico
3B - James Snoots
SS - Monico Corral
OF - Sylvester Love
OF - Reuben Smiley
OF - Wynter Phoenix

P - Boof Bonser
P - Kavonski Chatman
P - Everhard Griffiths
P - Harlan Highfill
P - Skip Pitlock

Honorable Mention, Uncomfortable Question Regarding Parents' Ethnicity Division: Juan Eichelberger

Posted by: Ted at 05:00 AM | category: Links
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By now, you've probably seen the official logo for the 2012 Olympics in London.

Personally, I kinda like it, although as a logo it's got just about everything wrong. Take another look at it, and tell me if you don't agree that it looks like Lisa Simpson giving a blowjob.

Follow that link for the hilarious animated version, and thanks to QandO for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 06:28 PM | category: Links
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Here's what I did using this Warning Label Generator:

It's going into the banner rotation.

Thanks to Brad Isaac for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 05:28 AM | category: Links
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The Descent (2005)

IÂ’ve said it before and IÂ’ll say it again: I am not a big fan of slasher flicks. IÂ’d rather be scared silly than grossed out with gore.

This movie wonÂ’t scare you silly, it will scare you shitless. Much like Arachnophobia freaked out people afraid of spiders, this flick will emotionally wring out anyone who's the least bit claustrophobic. Unlike Arachnophobia though, there are no little jokes or touches of humor to lighten the moment. This movie is relentless.

The Descent is the story of a group of women who get together every year for an “extreme” vacation. After last year’s outing, Sarah’s family was killed in an auto accident. This vacation is the first time that they’re all together since before the tragedy, and the tension within the group is high. Sarah and her best friend Juno are the alpha females of the group, but each of the women are strong and independent. Holly is a newcomer to the group, an avowed adrenaline junkie and although she’s competent, she’s also rash and self-centered.

The “extreme” adventure for this gathering is caving. Juno has selected a large well-known cavern to explore and the group has individually prepared themselves for it. There is some griping about going to that particular cavern because it is so well-known and thus probably relatively tame. The first sense that all is not as it seems is when Juno considers the map and guide book for the cavern, and then decides not to bring it, tossing it back into her car. Stupid decision? Maybe.

After entering the cave system, the ladies start exploring, and hereÂ’s where the movie goes from tense to eerie to downright scary. As they move deeper into the caves, a few odd things are seen out of the corner of the eye, or odd sounds are heard. Being a cavern, sound does funny things, and the fact that all lighting is artificial and carried makes for confusing shadows and murky corners. These scenes alone convinced me that you have to be insane to be a caver. The film uses the alieness and unknown nature of cave systems to maximum effect, leaving you uncomfortable and edgy even as things are going along relatively smoothly.

As the ladies pass through one extremely tight passage, one of the girls starts to panic from the ultra-close quarters and her friend goes back inside the rock tunnel to calm her down and help her get through it. How tight? How about on your belly with your arms straight in front of you, pushing your pack along while you push yourself forward with your toes. Tight enough so that taking a deep breath isn’t possible. In that situation, you could call me “cork”.

Things go downhill fast when the cavern behind the girls starts to collapse. Everyone makes it out of that tunnel, barely, but equipment is lost in the scramble and most importantly, their way back out is blocked.

Only one thing to do, and thatÂ’s to find another exit route. Only problem is, Juno informs everyone that she didnÂ’t bring the map along. Even worse, she admits that the map wouldnÂ’t have helped, since they arenÂ’t in the cave that they thought they were going to. She decided on her own that the other cavern was too tame, and led everyone to an unexplored system that sheÂ’d found.

Recap: The ladies are in an unexplored cave with their only known entrance blocked by a collapse, and nobody knows that theyÂ’re there.

These are tough ladies though. After some interpersonal conflict (to be politically correct about it, and not worse than what any group of guys would go through in the same situation), they decide that the only thing to do is to move farther in and find a different way out. Assuming that there is one. Holly, the adrenaline junkie, is seriously grooving on the whole thing, which just pisses most of the others off even more.

They finally find signs that the cave has been explored in the past, but the found equipment is so old that itÂ’s not a comfort.

You know what the movie needs right about now? Some way to *really* crank up the scare-factor! I know! How about someÂ… things living in the cave?!?!?! Hungry things. Smart things. Cannibal things.

According to the trivia at IMDB, the terrified reactions you see at this point are real too.

The appearance of the creatures was kept secret from the cast members until the first scene in which they encounter them was filmed. When the cast were finally filming the scene where the girls encounter the crawlers, the girls were genuinely scared and screamed the building down...

The rest of the movie is one long edge-of-your-seat mindfuck. The ladies fight back, and they donÂ’t get stupid. They donÂ’t let panic get the best of them, even when they get split up and things are looking bad. I wonÂ’t give details, because this is a wild roller-coaster ride and the more surprises left, the better it is. But for sure, the tension keeps building, the scares keep coming, and the intensity never lets up.

ThereÂ’s plenty of blood and some gore, but since much happens in half-illuminated shadow (not half-lit, but like a flare in a large dark room, where the lighting is intense in a small area surrounded by darkness), itÂ’s the implied things that causes the uncomfortable feelings. The use of lighting in this movie is brilliant (no pun intended).

You know what you don't see in this movie? Boobs. Gratuitous or otherwise, there's no nudity at all. I'm glad, because it would have distracted from the story. I'm sad, because the ladies are very nice to look at.

The Descent was written and directed by Neil Marshall, who's previous movie was the most excellent Dog Soldiers. Look for a Rocket Jones review of that flick coming up soon. Marshall is on a roll, and I'm looking forward to anything he does in the future.

This is one of the scariest movies IÂ’ve seen in a long time. My usual "highly recommended" isn't enough for this flick. For horror movie fans, I'd call this a must-see.

Posted by: Ted at 11:10 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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I'm still doing movie reviews over at Joe Horror*, but that doesn't mean I won't be posting some here. As much as I love old crappy B-movies, I've seen some pretty kick-ass newer flicks recently and I will be writing about them.

*This week, my review of Vampyres is up. Yep, the lesbian vampires.

Posted by: Ted at 05:09 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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The frightening thing about this photo is the potential effectiveness. Maybe we can help support the troops by calling our congress-critters and demanding that more beer be sent to our troops in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Thanks to Jay Tea at Wizbang for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 04:55 AM | category: Links
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Saw it today on a tech forum:

The Internet: Where men are men, women are men, and children are FBI Agents.

Yep.

Posted by: Ted at 08:38 PM | category: Square Pegs
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This looks very cool: Junior Generals.

The idea is that you print out the various forces involved in major battles in history, and let the students game the results using simplified battle rules.

Posted by: Ted at 11:08 AM | category: Links
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