July 17, 2007

The Underappreaciated Art of Firecracker Labels

You gotta love it!

Psst, Jimbo... check out the "Metallic Crocodile" brand. Woo-hoo! Big fun!

Thanks to Maelstrom for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 07:45 AM | category: Links
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New Movie Reviews

This week at Joe Horror I review Addicted to Murder and Addicted to Murder II: Tainted Blood. Check 'em out, along with all the other cult flick reviews.

Posted by: Ted at 06:33 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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July 16, 2007

Mookie: Birthday Girl

Yesterday. I didn't forget, except the posting about it part. Good thing I'm married to a woman with a better memory than I.

We didn't go see her because she's up to her neck in her summer job getting the second show up and running. La Boheme premiers on Saturday, we'll be seeing it in two weeks.

"It's an opera." I'll pass on the body-cavity search.

(Points to whoever identifies the reference.)

Posted by: Ted at 06:37 PM | category: Links
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July 14, 2007

Beautiful Day, But Not For Rockets

I went to the monthly NOVAAR rocket launch this morning, ready to generate some serious thrust. I had two big rockets prepped, but wound up leaving before either could fly due to a family emergency, which turned out to be nothing (and I'm ok with that!).

There's always next month.

Posted by: Ted at 12:48 PM | category: Rocketry
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July 13, 2007

Dinah, in the Kitchen, with the Poison

Ok, so maybe not as bad as *poison*, but still...

Friends, I can cook. I'm a damn good cook! A few of you have been to our house for meals and I'm confident that you'll back me up on that.

But...

My guacamole sucks. Seriously bad suck, which makes it worse because I love the stuff. I've gone the zen route with just avocado, tomato, onion and cilantro. I've tried adding all kinds of goodies and extras to it, but nothing seems to help.

If you make great guacamole, please pass me the recipe. If you only make good guacamole then I'd still love the recipe, because it's gotta be better than the crap I've been turning out for far too long.

Thanks.

Posted by: Ted at 10:52 PM | category: Recipes
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Rocket Launch Tomorrow

I've been getting ready for it all week. I'm planning on making a flight using my new Missile Works altimeter and the Contrail hybrid motor, another using a new hemispherical parachute that Liz made for me, and I'll be posting some pictures of my newest rocket.

It's supposed to be beautiful, have a great weekend!

Posted by: Ted at 09:23 PM | category: Rocketry
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July 11, 2007

Special Day

Today is our 26th Anniversary.

Never My Love

by Don and Dick Addrisi

You ask me if there'll come a time
when I grow tired of you;
never my love, never my love.

You wonder if this heart of mine
will lose its desire for you;
never my love,
never my love.

What makes you think love will end
when you know that my whole life
depends on you?

You say you fear I'll change my mind
I won't require you,
Never my love,
never my love.

How can you think love will end
when I've asked you to spend your
whole life with me?

I love this song as performed by The 5th Dimension. I feel this song every day for my wife.

Posted by: Ted at 04:57 AM | category: Family matters
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July 10, 2007

Gee, Who Knew the Pope Was A Republican?

I mean, tossing out the whole "unity" thing.

Pope Benedict XVI has reasserted the universal primacy of the Roman Catholic Church, approving a document released Tuesday that says Orthodox churches were defective and that other Christian denominations were not true churches.

Fair is fair. I remember being told by a Southern Baptist that all Catholics were going to hell.

Posted by: Ted at 11:19 AM | category: Links
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Dole Shares Are Probably Up

I have no idea why, but for the last year I've been on a major pineapple kick. I'll often have a can of pineapple chunks in juice for lunch, I love to grill pineapple rings, and the other night I even hacked up a fresh pineapple and carmelized it in a butter-rum sauce (with vanilla ice cream - yummmmmm!).

Now you know. The caring part is up to you.

Posted by: Ted at 11:13 AM | category: Square Pegs
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It's Not the Heat, It's the Stupidity

Mu.Nu has been getting hammered with gibberish spam. Not only that, but it's booby-trapped so that when folks add it to the blacklist, valid domains like google.com get inadverdantly blocked too. That bonks the comments in a big way.

I've been busy working on a couple of other projects, hence the light posting here. Pictures and announcements coming soon.

I know it's not original, but I couldn't resist the title. Damn, it's hot!

Posted by: Ted at 05:24 AM | category: Square Pegs
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New Movie Reviews Are Up

Over at Joe Horror, this week's reviews have been posted. Check out my take on Abby (aka "The Black Exorcist") and Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama. Go on, you know you want to!

Posted by: Ted at 05:04 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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July 07, 2007

World's Most Dangerous Tourist Route

There's some disagreement in the comments about whether it's in Tibet or China, but still, this is insane

sheer cliffside trail

Follow this link to Damn Cool Pics for more of what the title promises.

Posted by: Ted at 07:28 AM | category: Links
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July 06, 2007

World's Most Expensive Calimari

There's only one of these, so far.

What appears to be a half-squid, half-octopus specimen found off Keahole Point on the Big Island remains unidentified today and could possibly be a new species, said local biologists.

The specimen was found caught in a filter in one of Natural Energy Laboratory of Hawaii Authority's deep-sea water pipelines last week. The pipeline, which runs 3,000 feet deep, sucks up cold, deep-sea water for the tenants of the natural energy lab.

"When we first saw it, I was really delighted because it was new and alive," said Jan War, operations manager at NELHA. "I've never seen anything like that."

3,000 feet! Pitch black at that depth.

War, who termed the specimen "octosquid" for the way it looked, said it was about a foot long, with white suction cups, eight tentacles and an octopus head with a squidlike mantle.

The octosquid was pulled to the surface, along with three rattail fish and half a dozen satellite jellyfish, and stayed alive for three days.

Tough little sucker too, to manage three days after undergoing a pressure change such as that. Follow that link for a picture of the odd little beastie. It's a beautiful bright ruby red.

Posted by: Ted at 11:08 AM | category: SciTech
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Remove Head From Ass. Open Mouth. Insert Foot.

Baseball fans know that the San Fransisco Giants stadium is built on the edge of the bay, and that just behind the right field wall is "McCovey Cove", where during any given game many fans float around in kayaks and canoes or anything else that floats. They do this in the hope of catching a home run ball that travels far enough to clear the stadium and plunk into the water.

San Fransisco hosts this year's All-Star Game and it has been announced that motorized watercraft will not be allowed in McCovey Cove for safety reasons. Also, to accomodate the press, the Giants have chartered two media boats for reporters, which prompted this quote:

"Most of the media appreciate this," Daum said. "They didn't know how to charter their own boats."

To which Grant replies:

I knew a guy who majored in Boat Chartering at M.I.T., so I understand where they're coming from. You can't leave that kind of fact-finding and research in the hands of people who do fact-finding and research for a living.

*snicker*

Posted by: Ted at 05:13 AM | category: Links
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July 05, 2007

Not A Transparent Attempt To Look Like I Posted Today

Pixy is testing a problem we're having with Movable Type. This post is trying to recreate the problem for him.

In related news, I definitely have a problem. Just ask my wife.

Update: Dang. It worked perfectly this time... I don't know whether to be happy or not about that.

Posted by: Ted at 07:15 AM | category: Square Pegs
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July 04, 2007

In Which I Attempt A Burkian Circle of Connections

Yesterday I left work at noon because Liz had some lab appointments to take care of. After the first one, we headed to Wal-Mart for a few things and while we were there we decided to buy some flowers for the front yard.

Yeah, it's July and I still hadn't planted in the flower beds. I had ordered several types of perennials from Spring Hill Nursery in April, and we had some problems with the order. The Asters are *still* backordered, and after using the credit that they sent for new plants, I discovered two things. One, Spring Hill customer service isn't all that great, and two, *everything* is backordered until September. That's right, they won't ship the stuff they owe me until Fall.

Hence the flower purchases at Wal-Mart. We picked up some Vinca for the front bed, a few nice variagated impatiens to fill in on the side bed, and a beautiful pink phlox that will come back every year. There were a couple other nice plants in blues and purples, so at least there would be something growing in the dirt.

After dropping off the flowers at home, I took Liz to the hospital. She was scheduled for some tests and had to spend the night. We got her checked in and then I headed home again. Got a few things done around the house, and finally settled in and watched the Benny Goodman Story before falling asleep around 1am.

I got to sleep in until 5am (normal wake-up on work days is 4am), and then drove to the hospital to pick Liz up around 6 or 6:30. They let her sleep in a little extra because it was a holiday, which was nice, but I would've appreciated knowing that because I could've used some extra z's myself. Oh well. We got her checked out and hit IHOP for breakfast.

After eating, we stopped at Lowes for mulch and then headed home. It was such a nice morning that I weeded the flower beds, put the new plants in the ground, spread two hundred pounds of mulch and generally tidied up the front yard. When that was done Liz went inside for more sleep while I got to talking with the neighbors who were just emerging for the day. We're planning a family trip to Old Dominion Speedway one evening to watch the home-town boys race, kinda like minor league NASCAR.

By the time I got inside and cleaned up, it was one in the afternoon. I grabbed a two hour nap, then got up and put together Liz's new sewing table, which involved much furniture rearranging in order to get it where it needed to be.

It's been a long, active 24 hours with too little sleep. Right now, I'm tired. Which also describes my attitude towards Spring Hill Nursery, who started this whole burst of activity.

Somehow, when James Burke does this, it comes out so much better.

Posted by: Ted at 05:03 PM | category: Square Pegs
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We Can Laugh Now

Iowahawk has a first-hand account of the attempted terrorist bombings in London and Glasgow, straight from the horse's ass doctor's mouth. This, my friends, is a hilarious must read.

So okay, the big weekend arrives, and the guys come over to my place bright and early, everybody's jazzed about rolling up some kufr carnage. All the propane tanks and propellant and nail cannisters are ready to go. I look at Ali and say, "okay mate, back up your car to the garage and I'll start loading it up." He gets this dumbstruck look on his face and says, "my car? I thought Hassan was going to do the martyrdom." And then Hassan does a massive spit-take with his tea, and he's like, "whoa dude, I rigged the cell phones, I didn't agree to blow up. I thought Mohammed was going to do the blowing up." Then Mohammed's like, "don't look at me, pal, I thought I was just providing the spiritual guidance. Plus my car's in the shop for transmission work." From there it just descended into this big shouting match. Holy frickin' prophet, two years of planning this prank and now everybody wants to pussy out on the actual martyrdom.

Long story short, we decided to draw straws. And guess who wins? Yep, yours truly, good old sucker Khalid, the same guy with a pile of charge card receipts for petrol and propane and hardware. The same guy who ended up having to host two thirds of the martyrdom planning parties at HIS house, because his good old college "pals" always have some convenient excuse about "kitchen remodeling" or "MI6 surveillance," and never lift a finger to help clean up the empty bottles or paper plates or the C5 mess. Well, you know what they say: no good deed goes unpunished. Then the other short straw get pulled by Bilal, and I'm like, oh, great. Now I'll be banging some celestial virgin with that wanker looking over my shoulder.

So, I'm like, "okay, whose donating the cars?" And these dicks just look around at each other, and ANOTHER big argument breaks out, because "I still have 28 payments left," or "it's due for a tyre rotation," or some other lame excuse. So we draw straws again to pick the explosion cars, and guess who wins? Yup, my Benz, the same fucking car I just paid £129.95 to have detailed. So I go to the house and tell my wife Jumanah about the whole deal, and here it comes -- The Look. complete with the whole exasperated eye roll and head shake. I swear, if her dad wasn't my uncle, I'd be tempted to smack that irritating sneer right off her face. So she's like, "fine, go have your fun with your lazy jihad buddies and your 72 virgins. Just leave me the keys to the Jeep so I can get groceries."

There's so much more to the story. Really, go read.

Posted by: Ted at 04:29 PM | category: Links
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July 03, 2007

New Movie Reviews Posted at Joe Horror

Lots of good stuff this week, including my review of Jess Franco's Nightmares Come At Night.

Posted by: Ted at 06:04 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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Beverly Sills Passes Away

Brooklyn born opera singer Beverly Sills succumbed last night at age 78 to lung cancer. She was never a smoker.

Known for her bright red hair and shining personality, "Bubbles" worked hard to foster an appreciation for opera to Americans, making numerous appearances on The Muppet Show and The Tonight Show with Johnny Carson.

Thank you for sharing your gift with us. You will be missed.

Posted by: Ted at 05:51 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I Am So Annoyed That I Didn't Think of This First

ROFLMAO!!!!!

Thanks to Silent Running for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 05:40 AM | category: Links
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