What a great idea for a movie! During WWII, a Nazi convoy carrying a fortune in gold is ambushed at a desert oasis. Forty years later, the oasis is shunned by the Arabs because of stories that the undead still protect their cargo.

Nazi zombies! Woot!!! I had such high hopes for this one, but Oasis of the Zombies disappoints on so many levels.

I'll start with the biggest annoyance first, the soundtrack. Much of the movie background music consists solely of long, drawn-out minor organ chords, interspersed with stock generic "arab" music and seemingly randomly placed sound effects. It becomes obvious early on that you're listening to the same 5-second clip of a bird, over and over and over again. There are never layers of sound, when it's the organ, you hear only the organ. When it's bird calls that's all you hear. The dubbing in this movie is atrocious, not even to the quality of a Japanese monster movie. Everyone, from Arab street merchant to ex-Nazi commander, speak in the same accentless English.

"If Adolf Hitler came back as a zombie perhaps he would resemble Dr. Hook."
-- reviewer comment on IMDB.com

To give credit where due, the zombie makeup is pretty good, as are the bits of gore. Having said that, it spoils the effect when these supposedly WWII military veterans all return from the grave looking like a Beatles convention. For crying out loud, make the damn actors get a haircut before filming!

You know that continuity wasn't a priority when the sun rises, twice, in order to stop a zombie attack. Now if you know that the zombies only come out at night, then why in the world would you camp at the oasis? How about looking for the gold during the day, then getting the hell out of Dodge before sunset? Especially when you have to drive to get there in the first place.

Cinematography. Ha! Zooming in on the same spider-in-a-web three times in a movie is not artsy. Seeing the half-buried skull once would've sufficed, and the same goes for the box with the swaztika on it (by the way, after forty years I think the freakin' paint would've faded some, instead of looking like you painted it just that morning).

Do I sound pissed off? I am, because I'm so disappointed in this one after reading the synopsis and then seeing the movie itself.

Here's the plotline, assuming you care. I'm going to give it to you straight on, because like most everything else in this flick, they goofed it.

Modern day, and the commander of the Nazi gold guards has tracked down the only survivor of the battle. He wasn't there with his men, so he never knew where the ambush happened, only that his men didn't arrive at their destination.

Flashback: The only survivor was the commander of the British troops who ambushed the Nazis. All total, there were maybe 50 men in the battle, and apparently the battle scenes were lifted from an Italian war movie. They're very nicely done, but once again the effect is ruined when you see the same guys die the same way several times. Everyone 'cept the Captain is killed, and he's wounded, and he staggers off into the desert, where he's found by a Sheik.

The Sheik nurses him back to health, and the Captain and the Sheik's daughter fall in love. The Captain leaves to rejoin his army before a big battle, and doesn't return for almost a year. When he does, he discovers that the daughter died giving birth to his son.

Flashback over. The Nazi commander proposes to the British commander that they team up to recover the lost gold. Once the Brit tells the Nazi where the ambush happened, the Nazi poisons the Brit and heads off to find the money for himself. He takes along his wife and two strong backs to help.

The first night, the Nazi and wife go to bed, and the two strong backs decide to look around the oasis. One decides to dig a hole at random, and the zombies come up and kill him and his partner. Nazi's wife gets eaten and he manages to escape after being chewed up pretty good.

The British commander's illegitimate son (from the dead daughter) convinces three friends to skip their university finals and go to the desert to look for the lost money. He thinks he's figured out where the Sheik lives, and he can tell them where the oasis is.

I have no idea why nobody makes the connection that the Sheik is the grandfather of the kid. Through the whole movie this point is never once mentioned.

Moving right along. Find Sheik, find out location, find "Professor" who's also looking. Professor has female assistant who falls for one of the friends, providing reason for gratuitous nudity. They find "sick man", aka Nazi, who's dying from zombie bites. For some reason, the professor and assistant leave for the oasis immediately, but the kids wait for another day (honest, they never said why).

When kids find oasis, they discover professor and assistant wounded from zombie attack. They patch 'em up and start digging at random, looking for gold. That night, zombies attack. Kids panic, throw "exploding" torches (wtf?), and at dawn the son and maybe his girlfriend (unclear) are only survivors. Sheik shows up on camel, says, "did you find what you were looking for?". Kid says, "I mostly found myself", again, wtf? Sheik rides camel into sunset, kid driving beside him in land rover.

The End.

I'm disgusted with the utter dreck I've been watching lately. I love those movies that are so bad they're good, but I'm on a cold streak. This movie is a turkey through and through. But I have the answer. Four movies I've been saving, and I think it's time to queue them up. Reviews to come, and I'm almost certain there won't be a Nazi zombie to be found.

Thank God.

Posted by: Ted at 12:07 AM | category: Cult Flicks
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