June 24, 2005
Right up until I read this article about a Russian woman suing NASA over an upcoming scientific space mission.
When NASA's Deep Impact spacecraft hurls a barrel-size probe at a comet millions of miles from Earth on July 4, Marina Bai of Moscow will take it very personally.
The 45-year-old mother of two is so upset about the space agency's scientific assault on the celestial body that she has taken the unusual step of suing NASA in Moscow courts. Her lawsuit seeks to block the launch of the probe and to recover $311 million in "moral" damages.
Bai, a self-published author and spiritualist, said that she couldn't sleep after watching a television report about the Deep Impact mission, which is led by a team of astronomers at the University of Maryland, when it was launched Jan. 12.
"Somewhere deep inside me a voice told me the whole mission had to be stopped," she said in an interview yesterday. "I fear that it could have an impact on all humanity."
In court papers, Bai asserts that Deep Impact will "infringe upon my system of spiritual and life values, in particular on the values of every element of creation, upon the unacceptability of barbarically interfering with the natural life of the universe, and the violation of the natural balance of the universe."
Dolores Beasley, a spokeswoman for NASA, said it would be "inappropriate" to comment.
"Inappropriate" is NASA legal-speak for ROFLMAO.
And what the fuck are "moral" damages?
But Bai fears the bombardment could disrupt mystical forces. More practically, she added, it might create an open season on celestial objects by the world's spacefaring nations.
"If the Americans can study comets with the help of bombs, why not the Chinese?" she asked. "Americans want to be ahead of everybody. And maybe that's good, but not in this case. It's a barbaric method, to study the universe with bombs."
I'm not entirely certain, but I don't think the probe is an actual bomb. I thought it was just an impactor that would achieve its effect by kinetic energy.
"It's a barbaric method, to study the universe with bombs"
We'll never live up to those paragons of finesse and restraint, the Russians.
I don't care how long the line is Ms. Bai, stand in it and get another roll of tin foil. Your hat is obviously not thick enough.
*And for those proclaiming that this is a victory for WalMart, as if they're the main evil in the world, shut the fuck up and open your eyes. This isn't WalMart's doing, and nobody is going to steal your home to build another one. This is about developers putting up resorts and business parks and convention centers.
The Cons didn't score any brown points with that fuckin' court decision either.Ted,I don't think I have to tell you about the uproar over the condition of D.C. schools vs. the new baseball stadium.Just another example of how these ignorant bastards don't know how to spend the money they DO have.At least not to anyones benefit but their own.When corp.execs lose money they go to jail.The same should apply for politicians,too.Hold them accountable.Just like I've been saying for years the best way to go is to not own anything.Between taxes,expenses and bullshit it's nothing but a big freakin' hassle.I just wish i where the mayor of the town in which the judges who voted for that shit lived.Gee,Mr.Judge it looks like we need a new shopping mall right where your back yard is.
Posted by: Russ at June 24, 2005 10:01 AM (ObxzR)
I'm still ROTF regarding this Russian's take on America shooting off a great exploding sperm into the womb of the universe. Or at least that's what the comparison sounded like to me.
Posted by: John at June 24, 2005 10:02 AM (GuDvW)
Posted by: shank at June 24, 2005 06:40 PM (jfEhX)
Au contraire, mon ami. Wal*Mart has already done it. The Ryder Trailer Park in Milford, CT is in the process of being bought out by the town in order for Wal*Mart to build a store on the property (even though there's already a Wal*Mart ten frickin' minutes away in Stratford). They got away with it only because the park's association couldn't afford to take their case any further in the courts.
The New London decision is a victory for Wal*Mart in the sense that it makes the Ryder residents' woulda-been case moot. Wal*Mart now get to say "Ha! Thanks for saving us the legal costs by caving in. We woulda won, suckers, keep packin'! Ha!"
Posted by: Tuning Spork at June 25, 2005 05:42 PM (c4k0Z)
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