June 24, 2005

I needed this laugh

I've been doing a slow burn over the sheer stupidity demonstrated by recent events. Durbin (no honoriffic for that asswipe) ignoring the worldwide impact his slur upon our American troops has inflicted, just to score a cheap political shot against the administration, followed by the flag burning amendment, to the manufactured outrage by Democrats over Rove quoting from a Dem fundraising organization, to our (you didn't read that "our" with enough sarcasm, go back and try again) Supreme Court deciding that owning property doesn't really mean you own it if someone else with more money wants it.* I've fucking had it.

Right up until I read this article about a Russian woman suing NASA over an upcoming scientific space mission.

When NASA's Deep Impact spacecraft hurls a barrel-size probe at a comet millions of miles from Earth on July 4, Marina Bai of Moscow will take it very personally.

The 45-year-old mother of two is so upset about the space agency's scientific assault on the celestial body that she has taken the unusual step of suing NASA in Moscow courts. Her lawsuit seeks to block the launch of the probe and to recover $311 million in "moral" damages.

Bai, a self-published author and spiritualist, said that she couldn't sleep after watching a television report about the Deep Impact mission, which is led by a team of astronomers at the University of Maryland, when it was launched Jan. 12.

"Somewhere deep inside me a voice told me the whole mission had to be stopped," she said in an interview yesterday. "I fear that it could have an impact on all humanity."

In court papers, Bai asserts that Deep Impact will "infringe upon my system of spiritual and life values, in particular on the values of every element of creation, upon the unacceptability of barbarically interfering with the natural life of the universe, and the violation of the natural balance of the universe."

Dolores Beasley, a spokeswoman for NASA, said it would be "inappropriate" to comment.

"Inappropriate" is NASA legal-speak for ROFLMAO.

And what the fuck are "moral" damages?

But Bai fears the bombardment could disrupt mystical forces. More practically, she added, it might create an open season on celestial objects by the world's spacefaring nations.

"If the Americans can study comets with the help of bombs, why not the Chinese?" she asked. "Americans want to be ahead of everybody. And maybe that's good, but not in this case. It's a barbaric method, to study the universe with bombs."

I'm not entirely certain, but I don't think the probe is an actual bomb. I thought it was just an impactor that would achieve its effect by kinetic energy.

"It's a barbaric method, to study the universe with bombs"

We'll never live up to those paragons of finesse and restraint, the Russians.

I don't care how long the line is Ms. Bai, stand in it and get another roll of tin foil. Your hat is obviously not thick enough.

*And for those proclaiming that this is a victory for WalMart, as if they're the main evil in the world, shut the fuck up and open your eyes. This isn't WalMart's doing, and nobody is going to steal your home to build another one. This is about developers putting up resorts and business parks and convention centers.

Posted by: Ted at 06:09 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Now do you see why Libs are gonna give me a stroke?I wasn't joking when I said they're fuckin' stupid.Spirituallist?Take a peek at Penn and Teller's Bullshit!:Self Help for a good look at just how moronic THOSE idiots are.It would be funny if it weren't so sad.
The Cons didn't score any brown points with that fuckin' court decision either.Ted,I don't think I have to tell you about the uproar over the condition of D.C. schools vs. the new baseball stadium.Just another example of how these ignorant bastards don't know how to spend the money they DO have.At least not to anyones benefit but their own.When corp.execs lose money they go to jail.The same should apply for politicians,too.Hold them accountable.Just like I've been saying for years the best way to go is to not own anything.Between taxes,expenses and bullshit it's nothing but a big freakin' hassle.I just wish i where the mayor of the town in which the judges who voted for that shit lived.Gee,Mr.Judge it looks like we need a new shopping mall right where your back yard is.

Posted by: Russ at June 24, 2005 10:01 AM (ObxzR)

2 It's not a victory for WalMart (right now) but it's certainly a defeat for the average citizen. I blogged about it last night and the effect it "could" have on several "businesses" (read as: one is a church that is in the City's way because it's DIRECTLY on the tourist strip). Humans have the ability to be wrong (take Prohibition), as long as we own UP to those mistakes. Party lines be damned. The world isn't black or white -- the sooner people learn it's infinite shades of grey, the better off we all will be.

I'm still ROTF regarding this Russian's take on America shooting off a great exploding sperm into the womb of the universe. Or at least that's what the comparison sounded like to me.

Posted by: John at June 24, 2005 10:02 AM (GuDvW)

3 What the ef is going on in here?

Posted by: shank at June 24, 2005 06:40 PM (jfEhX)

4 This isn't WalMart's doing, and nobody is going to steal your home to build another one.

Au contraire, mon ami. Wal*Mart has already done it. The Ryder Trailer Park in Milford, CT is in the process of being bought out by the town in order for Wal*Mart to build a store on the property (even though there's already a Wal*Mart ten frickin' minutes away in Stratford). They got away with it only because the park's association couldn't afford to take their case any further in the courts.

The New London decision is a victory for Wal*Mart in the sense that it makes the Ryder residents' woulda-been case moot. Wal*Mart now get to say "Ha! Thanks for saving us the legal costs by caving in. We woulda won, suckers, keep packin'! Ha!"

Posted by: Tuning Spork at June 25, 2005 05:42 PM (c4k0Z)

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