The return of an old feature.

What if every sentence were ended with an "excuse me" instead of a period? Scientists have discovered that some fish fart as a means of communication. Thanks to Silflay Hraka (I think) for pointing this one out. Great one-liner over at their place too!

It's the electronic age version of learning about sex from your friends, I suppose. Welcome to Wiki After Dark (adults only), where you can hear the latest rumors and wild speculation about what sex really is. That might be a complete mischaracterization, because I haven't actually read through it. But I assume that like Wikipedia, there will be plenty of good information mixed in with the occasional outright lie or fallacy. Maybe like if you had thousands of opinionated childhood friends, and some were clueless, most were amatuers, and a few were actual gynecologists. Anyways, I now know that if I need to "get rid of crabs", I don't start with a big pot of boiling water and 1/4 cup of Old Bay seasoning. Thanks to Wegg for the pointer.

I love playing Slingshot Santa. From the Llama Butchers.

Michele did some photo live-blogging from the Macy's Thanksgiving Parade balloon prep site. Very cool pictures (scroll down to see 'em all).

Bou is blogging MRE's, military vernacular for "Meals, Ready to Eat". I had a few of the early versions, and dined on quite a few of their predecessor, the venerable C-Rats (rations). There's something about chowing down a can of sliced peaches with a date on it older than you are. So head on over and see what she and her two young boys think of "army food".

I'm not a big college football fan, but the history and trivia lover in me has really been enjoying Prochein Amy's weekly Texas Football posts. She talks about each Texas opponent and includes background information and plenty of stories and links about their traditions. Very cool.

Paul, of the defunct Sanity's Edge, had moved in with Shank, resident genius over at Id's Cage. Now, they've both joined forces with Jim and are now posting at Snooze Button Dreams.

Also, since I'm bringing back old crap, have a Rocket Jones recycled post from August of 2003.

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ItÂ’s a small world. Thanks to modern travel and communications, itÂ’s getting smaller all the time. ItÂ’s a small, small world. It should surprise no one, then, that these Carnivals are wonderfully international. We see recipes that have grams and dashes, millies and rashers, and it just seemed to me that there was only one way to truly celebrate the international flavor of the Carnival of the Recipes, because it's a small world after all.

Babelfish.

I can hear the collective sigh of relief, because at least some of you were thinking it was gonna be... that other one (yeah, I know it was rather too obvious. Work with me here).

So amigo, instead of getting that obnoxiously addictive song stuck in your head (too late?), what you need to do is to grab that fish out of itÂ’s bowl (and here you thought it was just a goldfish), hold it up to your ear, and read on.

But mon ami (I can hear you asking), what if I have no fish handy? IÂ’ve heard - but have no idea if itÂ’s true or not and amazingly enough Snopes doesnÂ’t say - that if you donÂ’t have a babelfish handy, you can use a frozen fishstick instead. The obvious limitations are that itÂ’ll only work for Scandanavian languages and youÂ’ll look rather silly with a fishstick sticking out of your head. Or not. Who am I to judge?

Yep, I put the babble in Babelfish. And so, without further adieu (oooo, heÂ’s a multilingual defiler of language!), I present this 66th edition of the Carnival of the Recipes, complete with snippets translated into various languages and then translated back.

Thanksgiving Goodies

It's not surprising that there were several Thanksgiving related submissions this time around.

First up is an interesting recipe for brining turkey from Sun Comprehending Glass. Let's see what the babelfish says:

My low and slow peoples are basters; they form throughout the year marvelously from Peru after the year. Low slow and lots of the result in 10 hours to terminate to a bird. With however salt, leave the cook, who the time is not shortened, because none is requested, heat aways even the furnace to run.

Now how can you argue with that?

Blog o'RAM offers up a bit of zingbird, via Salsafied Turkey and Jalepeno Cornbread.

From Ziggarat of Doom, check out Awesome Turkey which is another variation on the theme, this time using a rub with olive oil and braised in a roasting bag.

Checking in with the fish:

It is a income of ordeal and a new idea, thus they are real the final publication of this for with. The band of friction is little different, marks the lack of sage for example. Moreover, I have fallen in the bags for the turkey. The oil of olive makes precisely as the order a work that the butter for crisping ascendant the skin, and I like the aromatic substance more. Big pinchments and small pinchments they are a entire grass, usually for big make, you go there and [unintelligeble] the money in the fresh grasses.

Of course, you could follow the link above and see the original directions, but I'm a road less travelled kinda guy.

The Clog Almanac shares this side dish: Asparagus and Wild Rice Pilaf. It's on my to-try list.

Here's a repost from last year about a variety of Thanksgiving recipes, wine recommendations and more. Good stuff from The Glittering Eye.

Next up, we get a trio from Booklore: Thanksgiving Appetizers, Ambrosia Salad , and Perfect Cranberry Sauce.

Growing up in California, we just called Ambrosia fruit salad, and we were living large if Mom tossed mini-marshmallows into the mix.

Here's a quick and Easy Orange Survival Glaze for ham or turkey, from The Pragmatic Chef.

Non-Holiday Goodies and Yummies

(although there's nothing that says these wouldn't be wonderful then too)

From One Happy Dog Speaks, we get a twofer, Yeast Rolls and Cinnamon Rolls, from the same basic recipe. As an added bonus, there's a nifty hot-doggy variation in the comments. Yay Hats!

Whoa, that was totally random.

Cornbread. If you love it, there's no need to say more. If you don't, then you'll never understand. Two varieties, courtesy of the Pajama Pundits.

From Leslie's Ombibus, we're treated to Oxtail Soup. Mmmmmm, soup.

Two, two! Chicken and Sausage Gumbos! One easy-peasy, one a little more involved, thanks to Everything and Nothing.

This is the definition of comfort food.
Salisbury Steak, and One for the Road shows us how to do it the easy way.

Babelfish chimes in with:

Simmer related to meanly excessive heat 35-45 minutes until the sausse was not thickend and the tortini were cooked through.

For the more gentle cooks, follow the original directions. You gangsta peeps can use the meanly excessive way.

Risoto with Arugula, Sun-Dried Tomatoes and Cheeses. Doesn't that sound great, in a completely "I'm so sick of turkey" kinda way? Thank Cooking Capers for this one.

My Favorite Mushrooms. Apparently there's a problem with Oasis of Sanity this week, because I kept getting 404 errors while trying to access this. I mention it here to tempt you and tease you and make you come back next week like Pavlov's dogs, hoping for a working link.

ArmyWifeToddlerMom presents Another Pretty Salad. She notes that this versatile salad looks great on the holiday table, so I could have included it up top with the Thanksgiving dishes. But to me, this says "summertime dinner" too, so I put it here instead.

Chicken Paprikas is comfort food with a nice little twist, and like most soups and stews, it gets better if you make it a day or two in advance. Seriously Good shares this one, and it looks seriously good.

Elisson checks in with Beef Stew with a Difference, aka Beef Rendang. This is for those who like a little curry heat with their moo. Because I'm a thoughtful guy, I won't even mention the groaner he tosses in at the end of his post (oops, guess I just did).

From Special Fried Rice, we're treated to a recipe for one, namely Low-fat Chicken and Broccoli Alfredo.

Even the fish likes it:

The part of my process to learn of new good eating habits implies to try to calculate outside in a way to eat the foods that taste without the problems has associates to they. A fat version is weak here. Taste sauce Alfredo! This perfect age, densely and that he is rich.

From down south, no, farther south... waaaay south. Not that far south. Leave the penguins alone, they'll eat your babelfish. I talking about Kiwi south, specifically KeeWee's Corner, where we get a nice recipe for Tacos in Pasta Shells. Sounds good to me, I'm a Mexican food fanatic.

S.O.S. is its very own food group, although some would dispute using the word "food" in that sentence. Fill'er Up, Hon? shows you how to do it right, and when it's done right, it's wonderful.

From my good friend Tuning Spork, we get Baked Apple Sauce. He originally called it Twice-Baked Apples, so don't let the post title fool you. With his link, he adds the following advice:

Just remind people to go easy on the spices as they prepare the sauce -- tasting it for good balance. It's easy to go overboard!

This one... Mmmmmmmmmmmmm. Chicken Torte Milanese with Tomato Basil Sauce. Thank you ApparatChick.

From TechnoGypsy, we get Lamb Shanks, because you can't roast the shanks or they'll burn (I didn't know that).

Now if you need something vegetarianish, I highly recommend this Three Sisters Stew. From Shoes, Ships, and Sealing Wax, who always has interesting recipes to share, and the background stories to go with them.

Babelfish snippet:

The research revealed far more the auxiliary advantages of this "companion, it planted." the bacteria colonies in the roots of the bean take prisoner the nitrogen of air, something from which it in the soil are inserted, in order to feed the high needs of the nitrogen of corn.

Doesn't that sound so very German? All that research and scientifical talk and taking prisoners and stuff. Check out the original, just trust me on this one.

Courtesy of SilverBlue, we get this delicious sounding Spinach Stuffed Chicken. The best part is, by this time next week you'll all be saying, "hey, it's not turkey! Yay!"

Tuna and Caper Pasta, from FrazzledDad. It's all in the quality of the ingredients.

Blogeline's Journal offers up this heavenly-sounding Guinness Beef or Venison Stew. I'll be trying a pot of this in the near future.

Over at The Common Room, there's a sweet post full of ideas on being frugal in the kitchen and incorporates several recipes as well. Among them is Stir Fried Sweet Potatoes. Check this one out.

From Third World County, this simple classic: Black Beans and Rice.

Russian translation:

Wash and sort beans. I usually make this with the large tank and the grid. Beans in the grid, the water in the tank. Beans of water pipe surplus. You can develop mechanics.

They invented beans, you know.

Yummy prawny limey recipe (can be done with chicken). Gotta love a recipe with a name like that! Might as well break out the tequila since you already have all those limes sitting around being lazy. Thanks to Aussie Wife for this one.

Desserts

Not just Rum Cake, but Yummy Rum Cake (as if there's any other kind!). Thanks to In the Headlights for this one.

Slap Your Mama Chocolate Cake is presented by a feisty guest-poster over at Not Exactly Rocket Science (Yay Rockets!). Sinful is a descriptive word that comes to mind.

From Vermont's own A Weight Lifted, have a slice of Maple Pumpkin Pie.

Via Morning Coffee & Afternoon Tea, we get this chocolate yummy: Cocoa Apple Cake. She promises pictures next week, so in the meantime, let's let babelfish paint a picture with words:

Criminy, I missed the chocolate Friday almost. Still. I was, you thus do not employ work and trying to finish with of Thanksgiving, have to me much time to think have.

Ok, so it's a crayon picture. Hang it on the fridge.

Bananas. Bars. Bananas behind bars. There's an odd kind of synergy here, that makes me want to write absolute crap like that take Hollywood by storm. In the meantime, while I wait for them to beat down my door, I'll pass the time by making Best Banana Bars Ever. Thanks to Notes in the Key of Life, because these are going to become a staple in our house. Gotta keep those bananas off the street, you know, before they go bad.

Once again from SilverBlue, he offers up Three Emergency Deserts. I'm not sure about the emergency part, these look good enough to make just because.

Blueberry-Pear Clafouti is a baked pudding, courtesy of Blonde Sagacity. This looks so good, it's also on my "try soon" list.

More excellent goodness from The Glittering Eye, Pumpkin Chiffon Pie.

The above were in no particular order other than being in broad categories. Any implied preferences or rankings are solely in your own imagination and they have drugs now that can help people like you. Or me, for that matter.

One last pass through the babelfish:

All preferences or the implicit places are only in their its fancy and have drugs now that he can help you the people. Or me for this material.

Deep. In more than one way too. Anyway, I hope you go visit all of these people and make their food and share the results with the rest of us. Thanks for stopping by (and y'all are welcome back any time), and thanks to everyone who sends in recipes, who hosts, who keeps things organized, and especially my agent and my family and my...

Sorry. Storming Hollywood and all that.

Next week, the Carnival will be hosted by the Lost Budgie Blog, who will almost certainly not continue this babelfish silliness. Which reminds me, go put your fish back into its bowl, or the freezer, and for pete's sake don't get them mixed up.

Yay Hats!

Posted by: Ted at 11:01 AM | category: Links
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There's a small resort island in the Philippines called Boracay. They've been voted the "Best Beach in the World". If you ever go, there's a bar there called the Hobbit House. All the waiters and waitresses are midgets. Stop by, have a drink and since you're there, ask for the owner. When you meet him, tell him "Ted says hey".

His name is Paul. He's my best friend.

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Busy busy, so once again I lift entire:

There is a project underway that will reduce the amount of dependence placed on the government when a natural disaster strikes one of the coastal states (Atlantic, Gulf or Pacific). The projects name is Operation Enduring Service and was created by Beauchamp Tower Corporation.

Posted on phin's blog and cross-posted at Confederate Yankee are calls to press Senators to insert a rider that will allow this to happen. Due to time constraints the legislation required to make this happen is dangerously close to falling by the wayside-in fact it has to pass before Congress ends this Session (less than 14 days).

The project calls for the transfer of decommisioned and obsolete military ships to an established award-winning nonprofit organization that will convert them into powerful and 100% volunteer-funded floating rescue and recovery vessels to assist those in need in the wake of natural and manmade disasters.

Via Operation Enduring Service:

So, you want to see what these old girls will be able to do? Here's a list of only a few things we can provide during a Coastal State disaster (such as flooding or a hurricane)

----Service a disaster area of up to 10,000 square miles (up to 100 miles inland) with minimal (if any) outside support

----Provide complete berthing facilities for up to 400 emergency responders "on scene" at a disaster site

----Fully integrated communications system serving all local, state, and federal agencies, as well as cell phone coverage and military band frequencies--allowing for seamless communications between all disaster scene personnel, no matter what radio frequency or cell phone is being used.

----Daily provide 110 tons of bagged and palletized ice to the disaster region

----Daily generate, bottle, and palletize up to 50,000 gallons of fresh water

----Provide refueling station and loading platform for helicopters operating in the disaster area

----Carry over 7,000 tons of food and supplies for a disaster area

----Store (and provide delivery of) 700,000 gallons of diesel, gasoline, and aviation fuel for use in the disaster area on emergency vehicles and critical needs generators (hospitals, emergency operation centers, etc)

.......and that's just one ship.

They're talking about fielding two ships, not one... a regular "Salvation Navy." We have a chance to make a great deal of difference in future disasters (these ships may be ready for the '06 hurricane season) but we must act now. Think of the number of lives saved and the peace of mind that can be brought, while saving the government and tax payers money.

Any help you can give in the form of summoning your readerships to help press the key senators listed (and their own) would be greatly appreciated.

There it is. I call and/or write my congresscritters fairly often on various matters. This time, it won't be to gripe about something, it'll be to suggest that this needs to be done. You should too, it can make a difference.

Posted by: Ted at 05:06 AM | category: Links
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I visited my friend Dave's blog yesterday, and something I read there really bugged me, but I couldn't quite put my finger on what it was. He's Canadian and we disagree on many things. I say that for context, because I'm quite far to the right of Dave, or he's far to the left of me depending on how you look at it. Anyways, this morning while doing drywall (have I mentioned how much I hate doing drywall?), I was turning it over in my mind and I understood what it was about Dave's post that annoyed me so.

He wrote:

Sure the Liberals were corrupt, EVERY government is corrupt as long there are men and women sitting in positions of power. Corruption breeds in backslapping handshaking environments where people get paid 6 digit figures for working 20ish days a year. Deal with it.

Dave, you should never just "Deal with it" when it comes to your government. That kind of milquetoast, bend-me-over-and-please-sir-can-I-have-another attitude is exactly what those ruling bastards are counting on. You, my friend, are a fucking SHEEP, and if I saw you I'd kick you in the balls to remind you that they're there.

If your government screws you over (and by all accounts, they've been screwing you long and hard), then you vote them out. Don't like the opposition? Fine, hold your nose and vote the current party out anyway. Because you never ever reward corruption and theivery by allowing them to remain in power. And if the next government turns out to be as bad, then you vote those assholes out too, and you keep doing your goddamn job as a citizen until someone running for office understands that the people aren't going to put up with "business as usual" and cleans up their collective act.

Being screwed by your friends feels no different than being screwed by the other guys. If you don't recognize that, then you've already given up. You have the ultimate authority in your form of government, yet you're too lazy to use it.

A wise man once said that people get the government they deserve, and Canada is living proof of the accuracy of that. It doesn't have to be that way.

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1 I take it Dave doesn't read The Red Ensign Standard when it comes out? You should tell him to google that phrase and read some of what comes out.

Oh, and how do you like doing drywall, Ted?

Posted by: Victor at November 11, 2005 03:25 PM (L3qPK)

2 The drywall is done except for finish mudding. Today I did the ceramic tiling in the shower.

Yay hats!

Posted by: Ted at November 11, 2005 04:01 PM (+OVgL)

3 Baaaa

No, but seriously, I do vote for the opposition, but it's apparently never the populare opposition. Of course calling Canada's government corrupt coming from an American, that's a lot of the kettle calling the pot black brother. And I wasn't speaking just of our government but of all governments in general.

Besides, any corruption carried out by government officials is usually covered up so well during their time of office that no one ever knows about it. It has to be a seriously big stinker, like, say, outing a Secret Agent, before anyone is removed of office.

Posted by: Oorgo at November 11, 2005 08:00 PM (1JIkb)

4 LOL Be sure of your facts, amigo. It's only against the law if the "agent" is undercover, and Plame wasn't and hadn't been for at least five years. I know several CIA agents (living near DC and working for Uncle Sam, you meet lots of gov people), and a very small percentage are actually "secret" agents. Plame wasn't one, therefor no crime could be committed because you can't "out" someone in that status. By the scenario that you suggest, then anyone answering the phone at CIA headquarters wouldn't even be allowed to give their name.

Now as for corruption being covered up, well, Gomery seems to have shined a pretty bright light on some rats in Ottawa.

But all that misses my point, and that's the frustration I feel when I see the apathy that people have when that sort of corruption happens. Go back and read through my archives, and you'll see that I hold the current administration's feet to the fire when they need it too. I'm not blindly partisan, there's enough stupid on both ends of the spectrum to be annoyed about.

Posted by: Ted at November 11, 2005 08:48 PM (+OVgL)

5 Heh, yeah, Gomery shone a light on the rats in Ottawa, and the GOOD thing about the current liberal leader is he did something about it, and has all the books open to the public. He's trying to fix a party that's been long plagued by old farts in suits lining each others pockets.

The Conservative party though, that's an entirely different sort of corruption, man look at when THEY were in power and how much of our sovereignty they gave away, plus on top of that is their current religious fervor which so resembles the US Republican party hardliners (such as Pat Robertson).

You see why we have so little choice, I mean do you think that anyone will vote in a party like the NDP? They would in all honesty most likely drive us right back down the black hole of debt. I vote for them because I'm as you say left of you, mainly because I would never vote for someone who would govern based on his beliefs rather than the common good.

Posted by: Oorgo at November 12, 2005 02:00 AM (1JIkb)

6 And do mind the mental wandering, that's what beer does to me

Posted by: Oorgo at November 12, 2005 02:02 AM (1JIkb)

7 That's an interesting thing you say there Dave, about "govern based on his beliefs rather than the common good".

I'm not religious, but I can't see why an openly religious leader would be a bad thing. Religion is codified morality, and as long as the person didn't try to prosetilyze (I know I misspelled that) from office, knowing exactly what a person's beliefs are seems like a good thing to me.

And from my point of view, too often when I hear the phrase "common good", it translates into "we know what's better for you than you do, so we're raising taxes".

Posted by: Ted at November 12, 2005 12:32 PM (+OVgL)

8 I guess since According to Wiki almost 80% of Americans proclaim themselves to be Christian then it would be the majority good. The minorities can suck it right? (I'm just jabbing at you now, you know that right? Poke the bear, poke the bear).

Posted by: Oorgo at November 13, 2005 02:47 AM (1JIkb)

9 A politician who says he is acting for the common good has one hand in your pocket and the other stabbing you in the back.

If they say they are acting out of self-interest, then you can trust them... As long as they're in sight and in range.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at November 14, 2005 08:43 AM (QriEg)

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I saw this over at QandO (busy bee this morning, so I pretty much just lifted Jon's writeup):

The [Wingbeat Project] blog is "designed to help solve society's biggest problems by jumpstarting the generation of good ideas." How it works:

Each month, the Wingbeat Project will announce a new topic or social problem. Visitors will be invited to submit ideas for addressing the social problem, along with a contribution that helps us keep going in our grassroots efforts. At the end of each month, we will choose a winner from the best ideas, and the winner will receive a cash award.

And your good ideas will be publicized. It's a good way to spread your ideas for social change, with, as Wingbeat says, "a bias toward ideas that involve little or no government intervention".

The best way to minimize the demand for more government is to make it irrelevant. Check out Wingbeat and contribute an idea.

Pointing out a problem is a small step towards making it right. If you don't offer solutions, then you're only griping.

Posted by: Ted at 06:10 AM | category: Links
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Hockey Whoopass Jamboree trash talk?

A thousand words, mon ami! A thousand words.

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Jennifer did it.
Lots of other good folks already did it (and more too that I'm too lazy to link to right now).
So I did too.

WikiBlog.

Posted by: Ted at 06:39 PM | category: Links
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Over on the right sidebar, a snazzy little meter found courtesy of Dawn. It shows the National Novel Writing Month goal of fifty thousand words, and how many I've actually accomplished so far.

I don't know if I'll reach the magic number or not. My goal is to finish the story.

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1 Well, you're three times further along than me. Of course, we only have your word on that. No one has actually seen these 9300 words.

Posted by: buckethead at November 07, 2005 08:23 PM (Qgvr0)

2 My goal is met when I stop writing. It may take more than 50,000 words to make one coherent point!

Posted by: dawn at November 07, 2005 08:37 PM (Dh1V0)

3 Cool, Ted. Will we get to review the magnum opus when done? I'm hoping to finish, but my writing is not flowing very quickly (and I can't stand just writing crap for crap's sake).

Posted by: JohnL at November 08, 2005 12:20 AM (dYzx6)

4 Absolutely John. Good, bad, or indifferent, I'm putting it up there when it's all over.

Buckethead, I'm positive that you've seen every single word, just not all strung together in this particular order.

Posted by: Ted at November 08, 2005 06:03 AM (blNMI)

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This isn't going to become a constant and consuming blogging subject. Be relieved or disappointed as you wish.

I'm leaning towards waiting until the story is complete before posting the whole thing all at once. That lets me sneak back and edit the plot without y'all knowing about it ("Luke, I'm your uncle").

Here's my writer's profile for those interested in seeing how many words I've reached, and there's an excerpt there too.

If, IF, I decide to do this again next year, I'll be writing erotica. I figure "in... out... in... out..." oughtta be good for five or six thousand words right off the bat.

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Ken and Squip's one-year anniversary podcast is up! Listen to one of the first, and still one of the best podcasts going. Hear me. Hear Cindy talk about me talking about her breasts. And that's not even the best part of the show!

Now, where the heck did we store those champagne glasses?

Posted by: Ted at 08:27 PM | category: Links
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1 *blush* For our second year of podcasting I am going to begin talking ONLY about men's penises.
Fair is fair, right Ted? ;-)

Posted by: Cindy at November 03, 2005 08:02 AM (vg5qz)

2 I hadn't realized that it was such an integral part of every show when I wrote that first review.

And you're right, fair is fair, and it might increase your female audience too. I suggest you play celebrity "helmet or anteater?", and make it an audience polling thing.

LOL

Posted by: Ted at November 03, 2005 10:00 AM (blNMI)

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Conductor Skitch Henderson died at age 87.

"When it's right, applause sounds like vanilla ice cream with chocolate sauce."

Sounds right to me.

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By the guys at the Ministry of Minor Perfidy. Check it out, there are tons of interesting links to follow this time around.

Posted by: Ted at 06:02 AM | category: Links
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Thanks Margi, via the Llama Butchers.

Make your own here.

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