In a completely Geneva Convention Compliant sort of way.

The "GITMO Terro-Gator".

They'll be begging to bring back the J-Lo.

Posted by: Ted at 05:37 AM | category: Links
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NHL player Jeremy Roenick:

"I know we are going to give up probably more than any union has ever given up in the history of (professional) sports and, to me, I think that's enough to bring the fans back - to know what their players are going to give up as much as they have in the last year," Roenick said. "If people are going to chastise professional athletes who are making a lot of money they need to look at the deal we are probably going to end up signing in the next three weeks."

I'm supposed to feel sorry because millionaires stage the worlds dumbest "biggest dick" contest?

"We're going to try to make it better for everybody, period, end of subject. And if you don't realize that, then don't come," said Roenick, who spoke at a charity golf event he played in over the weekend.

"We don't want you at the rink, we don't want you in the stadium, we don't want you to watch hockey."

"I say personally, to everybody who called us 'spoiled,' you guys are just jealous ... we have tried so, so hard to get this game back on the ice," Roenick said.

You win Jeremy. You are indeed the biggest dick.

Posted by: Ted at 08:22 PM | category: Links
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Who didn't see this coming?

"We're seeing an epidemic of people who are having a hard time making the transition to work — kids who had too much success early in life and who've become accustomed to instant gratification," says Dr. Mel Levine, a pediatrics professor at the University of North Carolina Medical School and author of a book on the topic called "Ready or Not, Here Life Comes."

While Levine also notes that today's twentysomethings are long on idealism and altruism, "many of the individuals we see are heavily committed to something we call 'fun.'"

He partly faults coddling parents and colleges for doing little to prepare students for the realities of adulthood and setting the course for what many disillusioned twentysomethings are increasingly calling their "quarter-life crisis."

In other words, for the first time in their lives, someone isn't handing them the world on a silver platter. They're actually being expected to earn something.

Now, deserved or not, this latest generation is being pegged, too — as one with shockingly high expectations for salary, job flexibility and duties but little willingness to take on grunt work or remain loyal to a company.

Of course, you know that the nitwits who validated the mindset that produced this coming generation have something to say about it.

"It's true they're not eager to bury themselves in a cubicle and take orders from bosses for the next 40 years, and why should they?" asks Jeffrey Arnett, a University of Maryland psychologist who's written a book on "emerging adulthood," the period between age 18 and 25. "They have a healthy skepticism of the commitment their employers have to them and the commitment they owe to their employers."

Notice how they automatically assume that working for a living makes you a drone or a cog in the machine. And as an employer, how committed do you think I'm going to be to better pay and benefits if I know that this generation of workers has the mindset that every position is a temp job?

My daughter Rachael is "interviewing" for a job this morning (she'll start in August when she gets back from Governor's School). She's got the job already, but the boss asked her to come in for a half day "to make sure she likes it". Rachael already told her, "I don't care if I like it or not, I want the job and I'll work hard". She knows that if she does a good job during the summer, odds are that she can get weekend hours once school starts again. She also knows that she has to earn that schedule, because nobody's going to give it to her just because she wants them.

Posted by: Ted at 11:31 AM | category: Links
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1 Good for her, and good for you!

Posted by: Maelstrom at June 27, 2005 11:39 AM (z62e3)

2 Some cultures don't even have an adolescence, much less an emerging adulthood and other academically-approved periods of irresponsibility that lead until retirement.

Crikey, I remember reading Sibling Society by Robert Bly ten years ago. And ten years later, it's the same story.

Posted by: Brian J. at June 27, 2005 11:43 AM (V04ml)

3 I'm with you man, I thought I was coddled as a teenager, but then I hear about families like my wives or friends, who made each kid different meals at supper time because they were so finicky.

Or telling kids not to get jobs in high school because they're still kids bla bla.. Frig, I got a job because my parents wouldn't buy me anything I wanted, just needed. My 14 year old nephew is getting $200 for his birthday, 200 fucking dollars.

Posted by: Oorgo at June 27, 2005 03:54 PM (lM0qs)

4 Hey! That article came word for word out of my morning paper today. What gives? I liked the term 'kidployee' though, it so accurately describes me, especially in juxtaposition to the rest of my office.

Posted by: shank at June 27, 2005 04:37 PM (jfEhX)

5 Oorgo, I spoil my kids - within reason. Even then though, they have to earn the goodies by helping out around the house. It's a treat for them when Mom and Dad pick up the check at the bookstore or take 'em out to dinner.

Shank, I hear you. Believe it or not, I'm the youngster in our group of programmers. One reason I got the job was because I didn't come in thinking that they should make me king because of my experience. They had bosses already, I was willing to just be a member of the team. I should start calling myself the kidployee.

Posted by: Ted at June 27, 2005 06:52 PM (+OVgL)

6 I don't disagree, but I do think there's a bit of which-came-first with the employer/employee commitment. People my age saw our parents put in 15, 20 years at places like IBM and get laid off when they'd been expecting a gold watch at retirement. I think the notion that every job is a temp job started 20 years ago.

Posted by: nic at June 27, 2005 09:18 PM (IBRcA)

7 You could do what Madonna is doing.

Posted by: Amy at June 27, 2005 11:26 PM (tPzR0)

8 Congrats to Mookie, doesn't surprise me a bit. She'll do just fine whatever she winds up doing.

Can I brag about Brian for a minute? He just had his employee review after working at Starbucks for eight months. His supervisor told me she wishes she had six of him. The customers love him, he's always on time, and when she tells him to do something she can assume that it's done. I stood in the back of the store for half an hour last week when he didn't know I was there and just watched him operate. When I complimented him on it later, he said, "Who wouldn't like working in a store that sells mood-altering beverages?"

The kids are all right.

Posted by: Doug Pratt at June 28, 2005 11:05 AM (D6ZyB)

9 A friend of mine was hiring an assistant recently -- paying in the mid-$30s/yr -- a very reasonable rate given the amount of work required and amount of skill level/experience, well, NOT required.

These kids were coming out of college, saying, "That's all you pay?" I spent the first four years out of college making less than that -- a LOT less (like, $18,000 a year and, admittedly, not making ends meet). But I worked HARD and earned the experience and credentials that would get me into the great job I finally have now.

There's something to be said for laying the foundation to really appreciate the bigger things that come to you IN DUE TIME. Not to say that I didn't think I was hot shit with my shiny new degree and all, but the power of the pecking order cannot be overcome by youth alone.

Posted by: dawn at July 02, 2005 06:51 PM (Dh1V0)

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Thanks Stephen.

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We enjoyed our second Baseball Blogmeet last night. Besides myself, my daughter Robyn and her boyfriend Jeremy joined us, as did daughter and blogger Mookie, Victor, Nic, Rob & Big Hair, and Buckethead and family.

We saw a pretty good game and had lots of good conversation. Victor gave Rob a copy of the album put out by Lancelot Link & the Evolution Revolution. Because, I believe that there was some controversy over Rob's continuing series on the 100 Top Guitar Players of All Time list (/understatement), some felt that LL&ER's axeman belonged on that list.

Buckethead and I got to thinking about baseball music, what song you'd want played as you came to the plate. Being the smartass that I am, I was better at picking music for the other team. Among my suggestions were "She's Having My Baby", the theme music from The Three Stooges, and then Buckethead knocked it outta da park with "Feelings". Do you think it'd be unsportsmanlike to play "Big Girls Don't Cry"?

They announced several groups who were there at the game, so we also thought we'd need some sort of group name for next time. After reading that random reputation shotgunning of Munuvians we recently experienced (and enjoyed mocking), I suggested "The Vast Both Wing Conspiracy".

So let's see... baseball music... blog group name... it sounds like a couple of contests and/or polls in the future, eh?

I'll announce next month's game date. And I encourage y'all in the DC Metro area to join us, it's a great time. Victor is going to check into a Frederick Keys game up at the north end of town to give us southerners a chance to enjoy Saturday traffic.

This area has lots of bloggers, so these gettogethers can and should become a regular and growing event. Invite a local blogger to the next one. Steve and Robert, pack up the families and come on out for an evening of baseball and good times.

And the fireworks after the game were pretty doggone good!

Posted by: Ted at 07:29 PM | category: Links
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Reportedly, after this photo, the pilot said:

"I'm a cowboy in the sky. Ms. Nature couldn't knock us outta the saddle."

YeeeeeHaw!

Thanks to Corporate Mommy for pointing this out.

Posted by: Ted at 09:09 AM | category: Links
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There've been a lot of blog birthdays lately, folks being online for a year or two. CGHill, over at Dustbury, celebrated his fifth year blogging the other day (and the site has been continuously updated longer than that)! You ladies especially should head over and thank him for making you feel young, unless you're at that odd female stage where you want to be thought older than your actual age, in which case you should send him naughty pictures of yourself. Lets make it simple: all the ladies should send him naughty pictures.

Hey, it's worth a shot, and maybe he'll share with me.

When my diabetic Mom had her leg amputated, she spent most of a year in a hospice (leg and other related issues). Being at the other end of the country, I only managed to visit her once in person, but for the short time I was there I was impressed with the helpfulness and professionalism of the staff. Of course, Mom wanted to go home and her opinion was colored by that fact, but even she admitted that her stay could've been a lot less pleasant. Azygos of Spanky's Place has an interesting post about hospice care, the cost and the economics of Medicare. Very interesting.

From Owlish, we get links to the end of the world, and my oh my, a zombie simulator! *doing happy dance*

I used to read the Gray Monk regularly, but somehow he dropped off of my radar. I highly recommend a visit, you might enjoy his mix of history and culture from across the pond.

Posted by: Ted at 10:32 AM | category: Links
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Wikipedia is a cool concept where anyone can enter information about a subject, and thus a "people's reference" comes to life. Unfortunately (as the L.A. Times recently discovered), it also allows any nitwit with a cause to enter, delete, edit and overwrite information about any subject. This means that Joe Bigot can write an entry on the KKK and make it sound like a social club with a few naughty fringe elements who got carried away with the whole lynching thing. Likewise, Daisy Treehugger can pound out a screen on Halliburton and the price of Ozone and to the unaware, it carries the same credibility as actual fact.

I like Wikipedia a lot. I don't trust it at all, but I like it.

This morning I stumbled across this idea and ensuing project to create a tool to track the editing history of a Wikipedia entry:

I'd love to see a tool for animating Wikipedia history for a given entry or block of text (see Udell's screencast for an example). Bonus points for highlighting what changed in each version, and extra special bonus points for a way to scrub backwards and forwards through time.

Check out the link and be amazed as they've made some quick progress towards the goal. I'll have to dig a little deeper, but this sounds like just the thing to help decide if a Wikipedia subject has been hijacked for a cause or not.

Thanks to Dawn for the original link which led to the link where I saw another link to where I found this. Oh, and you get to see a video where Tom Cruise kills Oprah.

Posted by: Ted at 09:23 AM | category: Links
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Courtesy of Eros Blog (link not safe for work, this joke is).

A prosperous old dairy farmer from someplace cold finally sold out to the local agribusiness giant and retired to Florida. Being a farmer, he liked owning lots of land, so he had to buy a big place with a large pond down near the swamp. He fixed up the pond a bit, dumped a few truckloads of sand to make a little beach, and kept a small swimming area cleared of weeds and scum. Nearby he had some picnic tables, horseshoe pits, and a stone barbeque. Shading it all was a mixed grove of fruit trees.

One evening the old farmer decided to go down to the pond to check his fruit trees, so he grabbed a five gallon bucket to bring back some fruit. As he neared the pond, he heard voices shouting and laughing with glee. As he came closer he saw it was a bunch of pretty young women skinny-dipping in his pond.

As soon as they noticed him standing there watching, they all shrieked and went deeper into the pond. One of the women shouted to him, "We're not coming out until you leave, you dirty old man!"

The old man thought for a moment, and then said "I didn't come down here to watch you ladies swim naked or to make you get out of the pond naked." Holding the bucket up, he said "I'm just here to feed the alligators."

What's that they say? Age and treachery beats youth and enthusiasm every time.

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The Munuvian blogroll has grown yet again. Give a hearty "Yay!" and "Welcome" to the new cool kids on the block.

Owlish Mutterings
Mr. Babylon
Confederate Yankee
Country Pundit
Knockin' on the Golden Door
Mark Nicodemo
Dagney's Rant
The Gray Monk

Also, I'd forgotten to include one of the last batch of Munuvians. My apologies to Miasmatic Review, and welcome to the blogroll.

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1 Thank you, don't worry. I'm used to being forgoten.

Posted by: Contagion at June 24, 2005 01:32 PM (Q5WxB)

2 Yikes! I haven't even updated from the last batch yet! I really should consider switching to the automagic blogroll.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at June 25, 2005 05:28 PM (c4k0Z)

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From the "Naughty Places" category: EroticZipai.

"Zipai" is a Chinese term to mean pictures of a person taken by one's self. Sort of another way to say self-portrait except it's only in the form of photographes. The web is full of such pictures because many young girls love to showcase themselves in such manner. Zipai's don't have to be erotic but most of the ones you see on this site is. This site also features some voyeurism and amateur pictures.

Not safe for work.

Posted by: Ted at 04:43 AM | category: Links
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From Dale Franks at Q & O, a very nice presentation of military insignia, selectable by branch of service.

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Forsooth, in the joy that reacheth my very bodkin, I misremembered to add thy Witch with the majick fob to the roster of bards on thy right.

All is right with my world again.

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Real life Dilbertisms.

My favorite:

"We know that communication is a problem, but the company is not going to discuss it with the employees."

Thanks to Simon for the pointer.

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The Willard Hotel in Washington D.C. is major posh, so you can imagine what kind of celebration they'd put on for the 4th of July.

Cocktails and hors d'oeuvres in a luxury suite before departing for a Potomac River cruise aboard the former Presidential Yacht Sequoia to watch the National Fireworks show.

While on board, partake of a gourmet buffet, open bar and champagne, music and dancing.

Back at the hotel, overnight accomodations with breakfast included. Of course, valet parking is part of the package.

Don't forget the keepsake gift.

And an evening like this will run you $1,750 per couple, not counting gratuities. Personally, I think it'd be worth it for a once in a lifetime experience like that.

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The Phipps clan will be there, as will Rob and Big Hair from Left&Right. Nic and Victor have rizvipped. Who else want's to join us for an evening of beer, baseball and conversation?

I'll have to remember to wear my cup.

We're meeting at 6pm in front of the box office. Email me for cell phone numbers.

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Apparently they're all working for Formula 1 racing.

Sheesh.

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Over at Dynamo Buzz (your source for all political Joisey things), I found a pointer to news that in February next year, there will be an outdoor hockey game at Lambeau Field, home of the NFL Green Bay Packers. The matchup will feature the University of Wisconsin and Ohio State. Roberto's got more details and a link.

Be there, or be warm.

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Amy tagged me with this meme and went to the trouble of emailing me to let me know (and throwing in a little ego-stroking as well). Since I'm a sucker for flattery...

Five Things I Miss From My Childhood

1. The toys. We'd spend hours outside playing with G.I. Joes, and not those wussified later versions either with the lame-ass "real" hair and beard, or kung-fu grip, or even later those dwarf-i-fied posers. I'm talking real freakin' G.I. Joes, with miniature versions of actual machine guns and grenades and bayonettes instead of made-up "cool" weapons. We didn't have any stupid nicknames either, like "Cobra" or "Streetsweeper". No secret fortress or fancy basecamps, we'd dig actual trenches and ambush pits with twig and grass covers, and someone's Mom would make us little canvas ponchos and squares that we'd turn into tents. Each of us had one or maybe two Joe's, a rifle for each and maybe a pistol and a few grenades. Then there were the Erector sets. I had three or four of them, huge metal boxes stuffed full of metal girders and plates and L-beams and pulleys and hundreds of stripped little screws and nuts. Mine all came from the flea market, where my folks would run across them on someone's table and buy it for me. They weren't complete sets, just lots of random pieces thrown together for sale secondhand. That was ok though, and I would spend hours building giant cranes and cars, and every "new" box of parts was like Christmas. For a while, my brother and I were into Hot Wheels. When we finally talked our parents into getting us a set, I specifically asked for a Camaro. I was so disappointed when we opened the set and pulled out the two included cars, because one was a Camaro. Turns out that what I really wanted was a Corvette, and my parents achieved deification when they handed each of us an extra car and mine was the Corvette I so desperately wanted! I remember my brother's first car was the Hot Wheels version of the Beatnik Bandit in bright metallic green. We collected a couple dozen cars apiece and never went beyond a fairly basic track setup, although my folks bought us a pair of high-banked turns one year for Christmas. There's so much more... Lego, back when you had to use your imagination when building things with them, and your whole collection of parts consisted of red and white bricks with maybe a few clear plastic and the rare yellow, black or blue brick. I've posted before about the Secret Sam briefcase. We had a closet in the old house that was full of board games. The contents of that closet could become a post of its own, maybe for a rainy day, that seems appropriate.

2. Orchards. I grew up on the outskirts of San Jose, California (before it became the Silicon Valley) and our playgrounds were fruit orchards. We spent the days running around and playing in them, we camped in them at night, and often we earned a little pocket money in them during the summer by cutting apricots for drying. Later we moved to the opposite end of the city and instead of apricots and cherries we had miles and miles of pear orchards. All summer long we feasted on pears picked right from the trees and towards fall had huge battles where the ammo was overripe fruit. At the end of the day we'd head home bathed in a sickly-sweet miasma from the smooshed fruit that we'd been splatted with.

3. Rainy days. I still love rainy days, but when I was young my Dad built a patio cover made of corrugated aluminum. Next best thing to a tin roof, believe me. I loved playing outside even when it rained, and at night the best lullaby ever was the sound of the drops dancing and drumming outside the window.

4. Fishing with my Dad. For one stretch, my Dad worked nights. During the summer he would come home before dawn and get my brother and I up to go fishing. He'd send the dog in to wake us up while he brewed up a thermos of coffee for himself, and sometimes he brought a bag of donuts for breakfast. We'd quickly get dressed and grab our poles and tackle boxes and head for one of the local reservoirs. We had lots of choices in our area, but I remember going to Coyote and Lake Anderson most of the time. When we got there, we'd bait up with earthworms (sometimes with salmon eggs just for a change) and toss our lines in from the bank. We caught mostly crappie and bluegill, occasionally a small bass and even more occasionally a catfish. If someone was nearby we'd offer them our fish, if not we'd release them. After a couple of hours the sun would be fully up and the fish would quit biting so we'd head home. Dad would go to bed and we'd head outside to play all day.

5. Mom's Goulash. "Goulash" is what my Mom called it, although I know now that it was nothing like the real thing. I remember it had chunks of tomato and hamburger and maccaroni in it and I absolutely loved it. We didn't have it often because my Dad hated it, and I learned something valuable from him. As my kids were growing up we'd sometimes have something that I hated, but I ate it anyway because they liked it. And since I would do that, they learned that sometimes you do something you would really rather not just because it makes someone else happy. I asked my Mom for the recipe a couple of times before she died, but she never got around to giving it to me, if she even had it written down anywhere. I'll never try to make it from memory, because I remember it as being perfect, and I don't want to disappoint myself.

So that's my five. Thanks Amy, this one was fun!

The rules:

Remove the #1 item from the following list, bump everyone up one place and add your blogÂ’s name in the #5 spot. You need to actually link to each of the blogs for the link-whorage aspect of this fiendish meme to kick in.

margi lowry *dot* com
Note-It Posts
Eat The Lettuce
Prochein Amy
Rocket Jones

Next, select four unsuspecting victims, list and link to them.

SilverBlue
Son of Cheese
Dusting My Brain
Oorgo Blog

Posted by: Ted at 10:56 AM | category: Boring Stories
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That's according to this report, and Rocket Jones is already positioned as a valuable resource for the ladies who want to dance.

Now *I'm* doing a happy dance. No charge.

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