Like it?

Amy made it for me. She rocks.

Posted by: Ted at 11:45 AM | category: Links
Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 13 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Who is it?

Posted by: Victor at August 17, 2005 07:59 PM (l+W8Z)

2 Olivia Newton John from the end of Grease, right?

Posted by: nic at August 17, 2005 08:14 PM (l+W8Z)

3 I likey.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 17, 2005 08:37 PM (JWzsg)

4 It was inspired by the following post and the resulting comments.

http://rocketjones.mu.nu/archives/107005.php

Posted by: Amy at August 17, 2005 10:06 PM (tPzR0)

5 Correct-o-mundo Nic!

Posted by: Ted at August 18, 2005 04:48 AM (+OVgL)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

I couldn't decide on how to start this. First I wanted to just go "neener, neener" because it's me and not you, but I've already used up my "jerk" points for the month (don't ask). Then I thought about telling you about how excited I was (I did a nipple check, and it's true, I'm *very* excited), but that would give y'all mental images that would scar my children, frighten friends, and maybe (he said hopefully) bring a wistful smile or two to the ladies.

Secret message to Blue: I sound like a straaange creature, never before seen on B-B-B-Broadway!

I can hear you saying, "would somebody please smack him so he gets to the point."

To which I reply, "careful, we both might like it." (mental note: we haven't had a bondage post in a while)

So, if you've been following along, the aforementioned Blue is host and MC of The Simian Syndicate podcast. Their latest show is up, and not only do I get a shoutout, but Blue and Mad Monty (more than a sidekick, less than that crazy uncle you're ashamed of) run wild with it. After singing my new theme cue (think choirs of angels: "Rocket Jones"), Blue reads some words I wrote about the podcast (the Bobcat Goldwaith voice was classic and not far off the mark), they flatter me unashamedly and boost my ego until I swear I'd make Bob the dick drug guy look depressed.

Rereading that last paragraph, I see where I use the parens like my own virtual sidekick, interjecting asides here and there. So what would I call this new medium? Kind of a written podcast thing... wordcast? Oh wait. It's called a blog. Never mind.

So yes, they give me mad props and proclaim Rocket Jones hella good (that line inserted to annoy and embarrass my daughters). Blue also heaps praise upon Cindy and the Ken and Squip Show, which shows that he's a class act and shouldn't be judged solely on what he says about me. I'm sure it's the alcohol talking.

Ok, enough of that. Being serious for a moment, The Simian Syndicate is one of the funniest things I've heard in a long time. Their recent bit "Our Global World" had me in tears (and it's Mookie approved!) and they've introduced a MadLib segment to the show. Add in the great music, keep-you-on-your-toes banter ("drinking makes me Carl") and you've got one heckuva entertaining hour.

Aside to Blue: how about putting in a word for me with Soccergirl? I want a shoutout from her too.

I've come up with the perfect way to say thanks to The Simian Syndicate, and the beauty of it is that it's free for you and I but it could cost him money! What could be better?

Here's the deal: head on over to his place and download a show or two or all. Give 'em a listen (please use headphones at work or around the genteel). Or don't listen. Whatever. See, they talked about how they wish that they had bandwidth issues, so I figure that the least I can do is help them realize their dream.

Wordsmith. I'm a fucking wordsmith!

Posted by: Ted at 05:02 AM | category: Links
Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 554 words, total size 4 kb.

When I get to it in the next day or two...

Drink Rum. Sample:

Bigger = More Better

My life has been clouded by mystery. I've lived my entire legal drinking life in Virginia, where liquor sales are run by the "man". All liquor has to be purchased through state run stores. Not that big of a deal I always thought... until now.

Apparently, in South Carolina, liquor can be sold by anyone. Including those big crazy bulk warehouse type stores. I have found that Sam's Clubs down their are stockpiling liquor in amazingly large quantities.

Want to pick up 1000 rolls of two ply toilet paper? Hell no, but I would love to get a 5 gallon drum of Bacardi Silver!

Buying in bulk always seemed so silly to me until now.

It's like the light of enlightenment (shut up) has been shined in my left eye very brightly while my right eye is closed tightly fearing the wonderment of it all.

Liquor in bulk. I can die happy.

Funny, funny stuff.

Posted by: Ted at 08:43 PM | category: Links
Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 183 words, total size 1 kb.

Visit A Perfectly Cromulent Blog for the pointer to the "10 Most Ridiculous Black Metal Pics of All Time" and "Son of 10 Most Ridiculous Black Metal Pics of All Time". Great fun!

Posted by: Ted at 07:11 PM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 53 words, total size 1 kb.

Meryl Yourish had an encounter with a big-assed spider who built it's web in her front doorway.

I had a similar situation recently, and managed to get photos too.

(in the extended entry)

*Paook is the Russian word for spider. more...

Posted by: Ted at 09:34 PM | category: Links
Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 47 words, total size 1 kb.

1 No Spider Pool pic?

Posted by: Victor at August 15, 2005 05:17 AM (l+W8Z)

2 That would've been predictable. I try to be not.

Posted by: Ted at August 15, 2005 01:07 PM (blNMI)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

I've been sitting on this one awhile, awaiting further developments.

Some bloggers, like Instapundit, get free books to review. That's cool.

Thanks to Triticale, I learned that a short while ago Jeff (a prominent 2nd Ammendment blogger) was given the opportunity to preview a new firearm. That's very cool.

Lastly, a couple of weeks ago, I got an email referring to the Rocket Jones online biography on Brinke Stevens. It seems that Ms Stevens has written a new horror movie which is now out as an indie effort, and yours truly was offered a review copy. How cool is that?

The internet is a twisted place full of unexpected surprises. If you're using it right.

Posted by: Ted at 07:47 AM | category: Cult Flicks
Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 125 words, total size 1 kb.

At least Pete mentions hockey in this funny story.

Posted by: Ted at 11:40 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 17 words, total size 1 kb.

But I know quite a few people who can't wait for this keyboard designed for gamers.

Posted by: Ted at 11:38 AM | category: SciTech
Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 34 words, total size 1 kb.

Apparently there's a series that's been airing lately called "Rockstar INXS" that I don't watch (and according to Spoons, I'll burn in hell for missing it - sounds like double jeopardy to me). Anyway, one of the contestants, a young black man named Ty, laments:

It was hard for me... because, like, being the only black person on the show, sometimes I do have to think about like what I represent. You can count on your hand how many people have been able to succeed in Rock and Roll that are, you know, African-American, and I think it's unfair... (sobbing, squealing) you know it just hurts me!

Spoons then proceeds to convincingly smack Ty upside his virtual head. This is a must read, folks.

Posted by: Ted at 06:09 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 138 words, total size 1 kb.

Take the quiz: "Which Holy Grail Character Are You?"

The Bridge Keeper
'Answer me these questions three, n'er the other side ye see.'

Seen all over, most recently at TexasBestGrok.

Posted by: Ted at 11:44 AM | category: Links
Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 42 words, total size 1 kb.

The last three trackbacks to Rocket Jones are:

Hi. My name is Shank, and I'm a pussy.

Pestilence.

YUM!

Posted by: Ted at 06:07 AM | category: Links
Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 25 words, total size 1 kb.

1 You could probably create a whole post incorporating those terms.

On another note - I assume the whoopass jamboree is back on? I'm hopeful my Pens are going to have a good season!

Posted by: Catt at August 11, 2005 10:27 AM (uzcp9)

2 Heheh, I took the pussy out of my title, but then I got here and realized it didn't change your text. Not only am I a pussy, I'm also an idiot. WOO!

Posted by: shank at August 11, 2005 04:57 PM (jfEhX)

3 shank, it's the thought that counts.

Can you tell how much it bothers me? LOL I even proudly pointed it out to my wife.

Posted by: Ted at August 12, 2005 06:17 AM (blNMI)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Yesterday Eric was nearing the landmark of the 1000th comment left at his place. My timing was perfect and I managed to leave that magic comment, and of course it was pithy and philosophical without being too emotionally charged.

It was also about zombies.

So head on over, check out the awesome prize I've been awarded, and leave a comment to kick-start the climb towards #2000.

Thanks, Eric.

Posted by: Ted at 06:01 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 70 words, total size 1 kb.

Thanks to John at TexasBestGrok, here's a nifty link to posters and more from the many seasons of MST3K!

Alas, I actually own less than half of these titles.

Posted by: Ted at 05:18 AM | category: Cult Flicks
Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 39 words, total size 1 kb.

My apologies for the title, I couldn't resist.

I saw this over at Wizbang:

STS-114 Mission Specialist Steve Robinson transmitted the first podcast from space.

They're safely back on the ground now (in case you hadn't heard), but follow that link to get to the audio feed and/or NASA transcript.

Now, how can I get a shoutout from orbit?

Posted by: Ted at 11:30 AM | category: Space Program
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 69 words, total size 1 kb.

Over at Wizbang, Jay Tea tells the story of a family with a sewage problem. The solution to all their problems, in his opinion, could be handled by an adjacent WalMart. If, of course, they weren't such awful, uncaring, insensitive neighbors.

I was heartened to read the comments, because the response was overwhelmingly in WalMart's favor for a variety of reasons. In a later post, Paul slaps Jay down convincingly with more facts about the story.

I recently read somewhere (can't remember where) that Bill Gates and Microsoft aren't evil, although some people wish they were. That parallels the question I always ask when someone starts bashing WalMart: At what point does a company grow so big that it becomes evil?

I once asked a friend who lives in a small town what she thought about the WalMart that opened in the next town over. She was enthusiastic about it, and when I inquired about how it was affecting the local small businesses, her reply surprised me:

Screw them. When they were the only game in town they jacked up their prices and took advantage of us all because they could. Now that WalMart is here they're whining about how unfair it is. Ask me about unfair, and I'll remind you about when your choice was to pay out the butt to them or drive an hour to the city to get a decent price.

I've heard the stories about how when WalMart opens, they send armed groups of WalMart police to every house, round people up and force them to shop there. Oh wait, no I haven't. If your local businesses are closing up, it's because YOU didn't support them by shopping there. Don't blame WalMart for your decision about where to spend your money.

In the 60's it was fashionable to blast IBM (remember "fold, spindle and mutilate"?). In the 90's it was Microsoft's turn, and now the groupthink have turned their collective hatred towards WalMart. Notice how each of those companies got to where they were by doing business better than their competitors. Each achieved dominance by being better capitalists. They treat their employees rather better than average. But dammit, they're evil! They're... big! They're evil!

It's fashionable. It's stupid. Either think before you make that reflexive leap, or find a cliff first like the rest of the lemmings.

Posted by: Ted at 05:52 AM | category: Links
Comments (8) | Add Comment
Post contains 396 words, total size 2 kb.

Well, he does now*.

(warning: massive linking to occur because I'm pretty damned happy!)

Cindy (aka Squipper), of the blog Dusting My Brain, recently teamed with her partner Ken to create a new episode of their podcast (which I talked about here). This was actually part 2 of their show, and some amazing things happened. First, there was much talk of and about Cindy's breasts which, you may remember, I suggested. Talk about being responsive to the audience! Second, Adam Curry* called in and they did quite a long bit with him, which was fun to listen to because they're long-time friends and they obviously enjoyed each other's company. Third, in the middle of all of that, they gave Rocket Jones (and moi), a huge shout out and said many kind things about me. On the air. With Adam Curry* (who agreed that more breasts is a good thing). Me.

And, since many of you are fellow bloggers, well hell, we all know it's all about me. Right?

So I'm doing the happy dance, which is a unique and memorable sight to see. I'd podcast it for you, but that's an audio medium and all you'd hear is much crashing about and breaking of things. Watch the final twenty minutes of the Blues Brothers with your eyes closed and you'll get the same effect.

Better yet, listen to the last twenty minutes of the Blues Brothers while watching the elephant ballet in Disney's Fantasia and get the full effect.

In further podcasting events (I'm infatuated with them at the moment), I've listened to Silent Running's very own, which goes by the name "Shire News Network". Andrew Ian Dodge and Laurence Simon both do regular bits on it (I gather, I've only heard the one so far). So for rather more serious news with a down under slant, check it out.

Digital Podcast has tons and tons of links, information, ratings, reviews, etc on podcasting.

I tracked down SoccerGirl, Incorporated (remember, I said I would) and gave a listen to several of her shows. Interesting, and really hammered home the point that podcasting is the audio version of blogging. There are many styles and viewpoints and you'll find something for every taste if you look.

Finally (I saved it for last, but definitely not least!), over at the Simian Syndicate, Blue grabbed an original song by CruiseBox (released under the Creative Commons License) and built a wicked show around it. Strange, yes, but very very cool. If you're tired of the pablum spewed out by your radio, look into podcasts. There's a lot of great indie music out there that you don't get to hear.

(humming) ... mp3 killed the radio star...

*For those asking, "who the hell is Adam Curry?" Let me answer that, oh ye of little technical prowess (that's not a slam, I was one amongst you until very recently). He's known as "The Podfather" for his groundbreaking efforts in podcasting, and other things. Here, go read his Wikipedia entry and be impressed.

Posted by: Ted at 11:31 AM | category: Links
Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 515 words, total size 4 kb.

Thanks to SilverBlue for this link to the Rubber Ducky Condom Company (mildly not safe for work). When Mookie saw the t-shirts they sell, she mentioned how great they would be for gift-giving. I chose to ignore the hint, but the shirts are great!

As much fun as "No Ducky, No Lucky" is, my taste runs more towards the surreal. That's why this site just tickles me no end (major kudos to the Ministry of Minor Perfidy for pointing this one out!). Featuring religious arcana such as "The Flying Spaghetti Monster" (may his noodly appendage touch your heart), and my personal favorite:

Someone is attuned to my sense of humor to a frightening degree.

Posted by: Ted at 05:51 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 118 words, total size 1 kb.

Velociman:

TOYING WITH MY TICKER

I saw in a flyer today where Walgreen's is selling a personal defibrillator for
$1,495. Please. My coinhabitants of this hovel can't even put their dirty socks in the hamper. And I'm going to let them put the paddles to my heart? I don't fucking think so.

I am a fan of 911. Call it. Let the professionals revive me. You? Stay the fuck away from me, with those paddles.

Velociworld is full of brilliance like this.

Posted by: Ted at 05:06 AM | category: Links
Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 92 words, total size 1 kb.

Katana vs Machine Gun.

Is there really any doubt? But take a look anyways, because the super slow motion sequences of what happens are incredible. Too bad that in practical terms it means two smaller holes instead of one big one.

Thanks to the Flea for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 05:04 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 68 words, total size 1 kb.

After questioning the results of a "type of humor quiz", Dawn wounds me thusly:

No offense doll, and I hate to detract from your image, but you're about as menacing as a Care Bear.

Well, sweetie, since this is Rocket Jones...

(in the extended entry, safe for work in all but the most conservative office environments) more...

Posted by: Ted at 04:17 AM | category: Links
Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 263 words, total size 2 kb.