I've told you about the McCovey Chronicles before, and I'm telling you again. Grant can flat out write, and he's funny as hell too.

Here's a recent gem, about something he saw at the San Fransisco Giants site:

The Budweiser Clydesdale horses will be on display near SBC Park on Friday (3-10 p.m. PT) and Saturday (11 a.m to 6 p.m. PT) in parking lot A across from the Lefty O'Doul bridge.

And his response:

The horses are a constant reminder that Budweiser tastes like something you'd milk from a horse.

He also links to blogs from many other teams, so if you don't know of one for yours, chances are he's the guy to see.

Fer instance, who knew about the Orioles Warehouse?

Posted by: Ted at 08:42 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 130 words, total size 1 kb.

Five things that people are wild about that I just don't get.

1. Washington Redskins - I never really disliked the Redskins until I moved into the area. Every year it's the same thing, instead of eternal optimism like Chicago Cubs fans display, the Skins fans are arrogant as hell. Right up until the moment they admit to themselves that they suck. Again.

2. Drinking - My parents were social drinkers, and I grew up knowing what beer and various liquors tasted like. I'm not anti-drinking, but I seldom think to myself, "a scotch would taste good right about now". We've always got alcohol in the house, but some of it's pretty damn old. If we go out somewhere I'll occasionally get a beer with dinner, but it's not something I do very often for some unknown reason.

3. TV - I watch very little, mostly hockey and football. If that's not on, I'll switch over to a music channel (Sirius, the satellite radio stations) and leave it on in the background. Very occasionally I'll catch an ad for something on the History Channel that I'd like to see, and sometimes I'll even remember and make a point of watching it. Other than that, eh.

4. SUV's - There are some who legitimately require 4-wheel drive and off-road capability. Medical personnel in the winter come to mind, or someone who lives way back in the country. But the soccer moms and Joe Commuter have as much need for a Cadillac Escalade as a tank needs a kickstand. They're a fad people, and you're certainly free to drive one. But they don't make you special, they don't allow you to drive as if the roads aren't wet/snowy/icy, and I hope you're going freakin' broke pumping $2.50/gallon gas into it every third day.

5. New Movies - I can't remember the last time I went to a movie theater to see a movie. I rarely hear of a movie that fires my interest enough to even remember it, let alone want to see it. Mostly I'll scan the movies for the week and I'll see something I remember being a megahit some months back, and then I'll set the Tivo to record it. Eventually I'll watch it. Maybe.

Looking back over these five, I really come across as an anti-social bastard. I think that a better explanation is that I'm pretty easy-going, so if there's something I "don't get", it's annoying enough to be a peeve.

Here are Daniel's lists.

Wanna run with this? Go for it and let me know and I'll post a link to yours.

Posted by: Ted at 04:32 AM | category: Links
Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 444 words, total size 3 kb.

There's a short list of people on the 'net that make me green with envy amuse the hell out of me, and Anna is one of them.

Primal Purge is back.

Posted by: Ted at 06:38 PM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 43 words, total size 1 kb.

This week's Top Secret Recipe is for Hidden Valley Original Ranch Dressing. It's only up for the week, so if you want it, grab it now.

I thought the background story was kinda neat:

Indeed, ranch dressing was invented at Hidden Valley Ranch near Santa Barbara, California, by a real salad-wranglin' rancher. In the '50s and '60s Steve Henson and his wife, Gayle, shared their 120-acre dude ranch with University of California at Santa Barbara students and other festive partiers for rousing weekend shindigs. The dozens of guests were serve meals of steaks and salads topped with Steve's special blend of herbs, spices, mayonnaise and buttermilk. As word got out about the fabulous dressing more guests were showing up at the ranch and walking home with complimentary take-home jars filled with the stuff. Eventually Steve figured he could make a little cash on the side by packaging the dressing as a dry mix and selling it through the mail. At first he was filling envelopes himself, but within a few months Steve had to hire 12 more people to help with the packaging. Soon Steve had a multi-million dollar business on his hands, from a product that for 10 years he had been giving away for free.

Dude ranch. Cowboy. Steak. Buttermilk. Don't mind me, just settin' out some Google-bait.

Posted by: Ted at 12:13 PM | category: Links
Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 236 words, total size 1 kb.

Thanks to Random Nuclear Strikes for pointing the way to this... I have no idea how to describe it, other than rude, crude and hilariously funny.

Posted by: Ted at 06:12 AM | category: Links
Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 44 words, total size 1 kb.

Remember?

Derek and Amy have already entered.

Posted by: Ted at 05:07 AM | category: Links
Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 13 words, total size 1 kb.

1 How long 'til our time is up? I've got an idea, just haven't had time to realize it graphically.

Posted by: JohnL at April 19, 2005 04:20 PM (YVul2)

2 No hurry.

Well, don't take *forever*, ya know?

Posted by: Ted at April 19, 2005 04:38 PM (+OVgL)

3 I could give you a crude drawing!

But I can't scan it so nevermind.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at April 19, 2005 10:41 PM (N9ddL)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

It was only a matter of time:

"Each year, 15 million cases of bacterial food poisoning originate in U.S. home kitchens, resulting in nausea, diarrhea, fever, and even death," read a press release French's issued Monday. "Now, lunch doesn't have to endanger your health! All-new French's Antibacterial Mustard is the perfect way to add flavor to, and subtract harmful disease-causing bacteria from, your family's favorite meals!"

Coming to a television near you:

"Approximately 9,000 deaths per year are attributed to foodborne pathogens, and the most germ-filled location in the house is the kitchen," a woman says as computer-generated footage zooms in to show worm-like spirochete bacteria multiplying on a slice of bologna. "Normal mustards do nothing to combat the germs that begin forming on meats and cheeses as soon as they're taken out of the refrigerator. But an hour after spreading on our powerful French's Antibacterial Mustard, your lunch is still free of everything but zesty mustard taste!"

Not really. It's the Onion.

Posted by: Ted at 12:13 PM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 169 words, total size 1 kb.

The AHL season concludes today and playoffs begin shortly. Hopefully next year we can cheer for NHL teams once again.

Here's the list of players, thanks to all of you for playing:

Albany River Rats - Victor
Lowell Lock Monsters - Kin
Binghamton Senators - Dr Funk
Bridgeport Sound Tigers - Spork
Portland Pirates - Nic
Hershey Bears - Derek
Worcester IceCats - Heather
Wilkes-Barre / Scranton Penguins - Catt
Cleveland Barons - Ted
Hamilton Bulldogs - Cindy
Manitoba Moose - Gir
Houston Aeros - Matt
Rochester Americans - GEBIV
Milwaukee Admirals - Brian J & Frinklin
Utah Grizzlies - Jenn

For those who don't know what this is all about, the simple rules are here.

If you didn't play this year, you're welcome to join us next year for the Third Annual Hockey Whoopass Jamboree. Not interested? What have you got against tradition?

Posted by: Ted at 12:09 PM | category: Links
Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 152 words, total size 2 kb.

1 it was fun. Hard to keep up with at times, but fun.

Posted by: Derek at April 18, 2005 01:09 PM (wEVXE)

2 I feel so ashamed. After the first week, I hardly ever payed any attention to the jamboree. I thought that I would be able to keep an eye on the Rochester Americans since they were so close as well as being the 'farm' team for the Sabres. But without the NHL, I just couldn't get into hockey at all this year.

Fortunately, the Amerks won a lot of their games this year, so much of the time I had the right logo up on my sidebar anyways...

We'll see what next year brings.

Posted by: GEBIV at April 18, 2005 03:13 PM (vI2yr)

3 So, like, did anyone actually keep tabs on the match-ups? Can we produce a Whoopass League Standings? No doubt I'm in the 2nd division...

Posted by: Tuning Spork at April 18, 2005 10:12 PM (Ns1Gb)

4 Spork, keeping track of those standings would be way too much work. I didn't bother.

Besides, my Cleveland Barons wound up dead last, so of course I'll claim that standings are overrated. LOL

Posted by: Ted at April 19, 2005 05:57 AM (blNMI)

5 I was remiss last week in including the Utah Grizzlies logo on my page because one never expects to lose to the Grizzlies.

Posted by: Brian J. at April 19, 2005 09:00 AM (V04ml)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Kitty Says
Pole Dancing In the Dark
American Warmonger
Beekeeper
Grumbles
Alex In Wonderland
Weasel Manor

Hola and welcome.

Posted by: Ted at 06:07 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 27 words, total size 1 kb.

Many formats (scroll down to find one compatible with your handheld).

While you're at it, this might interest you as well: Towards Understanding Islam.

I am a serious ebook junkie.

Posted by: Ted at 06:08 PM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 40 words, total size 1 kb.

View the latest fashions in Amish swimwear. Safe for work. Safe for the Vatican.

Forgot where I found this. Sorry.

Posted by: Ted at 05:45 AM | category: Links
Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 42 words, total size 1 kb.

I talked about this a few months ago, but it was postponed due to the tragic tsunami that swept through that part of the world.

It's going on now. Check out the unfolding events at Silent Running.

Posted by: Ted at 08:52 PM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 41 words, total size 1 kb.

The Spacemonkey has had an amazing response when he offered up Gmail invites for the asking. And since I'm nothing if not derivitive, I'll extend the same deal.

Leave a comment asking for a Gmail invite, and I'll send one to you. How's that for complicating your life?

Posted by: Ted at 11:41 AM | category: Links
Comments (5) | Add Comment
Post contains 62 words, total size 1 kb.

Check out Tom's Astronomy Blog for news and bits about the science of looking up. Cool pictures too.

Posted by: Ted at 08:13 PM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 22 words, total size 1 kb.

Not the TV series, and not the number of the greatest baseball player of all time (Willie Mays), but the number of a race car.

NASCAR's number 24 has a new prime sponsor: Bourdreaux's Butt Paste.

The driver is Kim Crosby. I don't follow NASCAR, is she the only female on the circuit? Anyways, it's like Stroker Ace come to life.

Thanks to McQ at Q&O for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 11:45 AM | category: Links
Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 71 words, total size 1 kb.

We have entries in the Rocket Jones Banner Contest!

Go check 'em out (yep, it's another linkevent).

Derek, who names computers after dairy products.

Amy, who is flamboyantly and extravagantly carnivorous.

These are wonderful and I can't wait to see what you come up with. Yes, you.

Posted by: Ted at 06:09 AM | category: Links
Comments (4) | Add Comment
Post contains 51 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Man, it's hard to compete with those.

Posted by: Victor at April 07, 2005 07:35 AM (L3qPK)

2 Would it help if I changed the "contest" into outright begging for new banners from everyone? That's what it is, basically.

Posted by: Ted at April 07, 2005 09:05 AM (blNMI)

3 Well, it'd be more honest.

Posted by: Victor at April 07, 2005 10:22 AM (L3qPK)

4 aww, man, We're supposed to be COMPETING!? I've gotta go make more better ones.

Posted by: Derek at April 07, 2005 04:22 PM (wEVXE)

Hide Comments | Add Comment

Lynn S posts this hilarious conversation between God and St. Francis.

Subject? Yardwork.

Yips to the Llamas for the pointer.

Posted by: Ted at 04:25 AM | category: Links
No Comments | Add Comment
Post contains 34 words, total size 1 kb.

Brian J. Noggle celebrated his 3rd blog anniversary yesterday.

Why aren't you a Munuvian?

Posted by: Ted at 12:25 PM | category: Links
Comments (2) | Add Comment
Post contains 18 words, total size 1 kb.

Kicks ass.

Posted by: Ted at 06:12 AM | category: Links
Comments (1) | Add Comment
Post contains 4 words, total size 1 kb.

That's the official Munuvian greeting and expression of joy. Find a fiver on the ground? Yay! Your team is playing like they're unbeatable? Yay! Girlfriend comes home from a bachelorette party half-sloshed, horny as hell and arm in arm with her bisexual college roommate? Well, duh. Yay!

Like I said: expression of joy.

But it's also the official Munuvian greeting. So go visit these latest residents and if they've bothered to post something, leave 'em a Yay! in the comments.

Rhymes With Right
Possumblog
Something for the Weekend
Seven Inches of Sense
Stolen Beauty
View from the Pew
A Swift Kick and A Bandaid
Professor Chaos
Cal Tech Girl's World

Tell 'em Ted sent ya.

Posted by: Ted at 05:10 AM | category: Links
Comments (3) | Add Comment
Post contains 117 words, total size 1 kb.

1 Uh, Ted, I feel really compelled to ask, has that ever happened? The sloshed girlfriend with the bi-sexual college room mate? Or is that something that belongs more in a publication with a story which might start, "I was a freshman in a small northeastern liberal arts college and I never thought anything like this would have happened to me, but . . ."? Here's hoping it happened!

Posted by: RP at April 06, 2005 03:25 PM (LlPKh)

2 Oh, how to respond?

A gentleman never tells. That's always a good answer, and it applies exceptionally well here.

Or maybe it's just the biggest "Yay!" event I could come up with as I whipped out that post.

Now, as to your supposed letter, let me point you towards this: http://rocketjones.mu.nu/archives/010684.html

I hope that doesn't clear things up too much.

Posted by: Ted at April 06, 2005 04:16 PM (ZjSa7)

3 Excellent reply. As for your letter clearing things up, I knew that a man of taste and distinction, such as yourself, would immediately get the stereotypical beginning of far too many Forum letters. In fact, for kicks, back in college we used to all get together on the floor and read them out loud to each other for the general amusement of the floor mates.

As for biggest yay! event you could come up with, I'll go on record as acknowledging that you (one) think big and (two) fully grasp the yay! concept.

Posted by: RP at April 06, 2005 05:21 PM (LlPKh)

Hide Comments | Add Comment