My cultlike following is now accepting applications.

Posted by: Ted at 12:07 PM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Do we get a membership card and a monthly newsletter?!

Posted by: Tuning Spork at June 15, 2004 12:27 PM (xPu6v)

2 What flavor is the Kool-Ade?

Posted by: Stephen Macklin at June 15, 2004 01:15 PM (UquFN)

3 No Kool-Aid please - I'm on a diet. A membership card would be nice, however.

Posted by: Patton at June 15, 2004 01:57 PM (cLlFA)

4 Fridge magnets.

Posted by: topdawg at June 15, 2004 08:02 PM (JMaAr)

5 If this is one of those low-carb things I'm not interested. Otherwise where do I sign?

Posted by: Simon at June 16, 2004 01:17 AM (FUPxT)

6 Do you accept applications from unemployed aussies?

Posted by: Ozguru at June 16, 2004 02:35 AM (IDkHx)

7 "The Cult of Ted" actually has kinda a nice ring to it.

If the kool-aid is Jack Daniels or George Dickel flavored, I'm in.

Posted by: Victor at June 16, 2004 01:38 PM (L3qPK)

8 Um, applications for what?

or more importantly...

Applications OF what?

And where!?!

Posted by: Wind Rider at June 17, 2004 11:27 PM (X5gsh)

9 Fridge magnets WR, anywhere you want. All the cool kids are doing it these days.

Posted by: Ted at June 18, 2004 07:47 AM (blNMI)

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I'll take "Unfortunate Names" for one thousand, Alex.

Who is the only person worse off than this guy?

Thanks to Simon for pointing at the first poor soul.

Posted by: Ted at 11:49 AM | category: Square Pegs
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My PC at work has programmable function keys, and I have them set up to take me various places like our work systems, Google, Rocket Jones, and so on. Seeing's how the average user in the building isn't very technologically sophisticated, I was thinking that it'd be fun to reprogram the function keys to lead to weird and wonderful places on the internet. I'll leave the important work related ones, but I need some ideas for other destinations.

I was thinking Despair.com to start, but I need your evil suggestions. No porn, this is a work computer.

Posted by: Ted at 07:17 AM | category: Square Pegs
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In traffic, bopping with Earth, Wind & Fire, I spied a dump truck chugging along. And as Philip Bailey croons:

We have a magic box
One that is never locked

For all your dirt needs
call 555-9999

Posted by: Ted at 06:42 AM | category: Square Pegs
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All the I's are crossed and the T's are dotted, and this is my last week on this project. Beginning next monday, my commute distance doubles, my hours start even earlier, and I'll be back in a learning environment again. I'm looking forward to this change because I've gotten stale and too comfortable where I'm at.

I may vent and bitch about work at some future date, but then again, what's the point? I take great comfort in the fact that I'm being replaced by a singularly unhelpful "help desk", and their personnel turnover so far is massive and constant. Most of my users have already stopped by to say goodbye and tell me how sorry they are to see me go, which is always good for the ego.

I may occasionally do a remote Nog Watch, so those anxiously riveted to their seats need not worry.

I like working early hours, so I've already gotten the ok to work 6am-3pm at the new place. This is good because I'll miss the worst of the traffic both ways. It's bad because I'll have to leave my house at 5am, at least until I figure out exactly how long it'll take to get there.

During the interview, the big boss explained what they were doing and where they were going with the new project, then asked me what I thought about it. I told him it sounded like fun.

*nipple check* Yep, I'm excited.

Posted by: Ted at 10:41 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Why the Chicken Crossed the Road -- USAF Interpretation

Colonel: Successful crossing, well planned and carried out in accordance with my directives.

Chief: About time that thing worked; hope the Colonel's finally happy.

NCO: Changed two wings, a beak, and removed a bad egg, and the silly thing still can't fly!

2nd Lt: Look at the pretty bird!

(there's more in the extended entry) more...

Posted by: Ted at 06:19 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Congrats to the Lightning. Normal sleep patterns shall now resume.

Posted by: Ted at 05:39 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Really. A dirty cartoon with nudity and sexual content. In the extended entry. more...

Posted by: Ted at 05:26 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Rates on federal student loans have fallen to around 3 percent — a 35-year low. Even better, students can lock in those rates, potentially saving thousands of dollars by ensuring their payments won't increase even if interest rates do.

But a proposal in Congress could shut down the party. The measure would end the fixed-rate option, making all federal student loans issued after July 2006 subject to variable rates. Repayments would then rise and fall each year in sync with interest rates.

Posted by: Ted at 01:02 PM | category: Square Pegs
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In the extended entry. more...

Posted by: Ted at 06:19 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I had one of those oddly productive weekends where you look back and say "wow, I got a lot done!" Yardwork, trees pruned, gutters cleaned, errands run, wallpaper scraped, naps taken, meat grilled, house cleaned, laundry done, etc., etc. I stayed mostly busy, but still I'm nicely recharged for the week.

I could use some sleep though. I stayed up into the wee hours each night, watching my crap movies. Now our young dog is sick. He's acting like a typical male cat, winding around your feet constantly and demanding attention. Not sure what's wrong, but he's still eating and playful. He's just acting 'off'. Of course, being sick he's restless and was constantly walking around on the bed all night. He's little too, so my sleeping body is nothing more than an obsticle to be navigated over in the dark. He woke me up more than once doing the little doggy circle-dance on my back as he tried to get comfortable.

I was also a major oinker all weekend about eating. Constantly hungry for some reason. To make up for it and get my slacker butt back into healthy food mode, today I brought a low-fat yogurt for breakfast and fruit for lunch. If anyone is interested, I've lost about 30 pounds since the beginning of the year.

Yesterday, the Action Channel showed a Combat! marathon. Starring Vic Morrow, the series ran in the early 60's and was about a platoon during WWII. I had it on for most of the day, which really brought back some memories. Combat! and Bonanza are the first two shows I can remember watching with my dad.

A friend sent me this:

If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you can read this in English, thank the US Military.

Posted by: Ted at 05:41 AM | category: Square Pegs
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