Please? August has been one less-than-wonderful month around the ol' homestead.

Posted by: Ted at 05:21 AM | category: Square Pegs
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That certainly describes Rocket Jones lately. I've been a tad busy, so a lot of recent posts are full of quickie links sprayed around like some manic link-sprinkler. Yeah, that's me - a link-sprinkler!

Posted by: Ted at 06:15 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Today I met up with a friend from my old workplace. We had some lunch, and he says "you been smoking crack?" because I've lost some more weight. It's been slow and steady for me, so I don't really notice it other than clothing-wise. Even if he was just being nice, I appreciated the comment. The crack helps too.

Posted by: Ted at 07:20 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Since the spammers have refined the word randomizer routines they use, some of their 'from' names and subject lines have been pretty entertaining. This one was too good not to share:

Need a lover to enjoy this weekend with ,? That person you want to find is here ,. bacterial infantry

Posted by: Ted at 05:45 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Like they say: if it's worth doing, it's worth doing right...

(in the extended entry) more...

Posted by: Ted at 05:29 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I'm reading a weird little book titled "The Planet Mars and It's Inhabitants" by one Eros Urides who supposedly lived on Mars for a time. It's a whackjob book, the kind you find on UFO sites and the like, usually listed as 'true but suppressed important works'. I tried digging up more information on it, but all Googles lead to the sites that present it as non-fiction.

In the book, Eros Urides describes a utopian Mars where spirituality is part of the very fabric of life. Mars is 100% Christian, and much preaching ensueth within. But one passage kind of tweaks at me:

As all property is considered as belonging to the Father, and is held in common by the people of the planet, there exists no incentive for anyone to steal. Each individual has all he requires for his comfort.

Posted by: Ted at 01:20 PM | category: Square Pegs
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1 It'd be the only way communism could work: in a vacuum with an absolute authoritarian at the top.

Posted by: Linda at August 20, 2004 02:40 PM (mmKG+)

2 Yes, it's still communism. The fact [sic] that the planet is 100% Christian could only be because of forced conformity.

Or, maybe the Martians are just averse to asking questions.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 21, 2004 01:12 PM (aQTmy)

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We've had the power go out twice now in the last two nights as strong thunderstorms moved through the area. In the last fifteen years, I'd wager that we haven't lost electricity more than twenty times total, which makes this notable.

Our electric co-op NOVEC, is also incredibly efficient at restoring power when it does fail. A typical outtage lasts 10 minutes, and an hour or more is something worthy of neighborhood conversation.

Atta boy NOVEC, even though you've deprived me of a good excuse to sleep in on work days.

Posted by: Ted at 06:04 AM | category: Square Pegs
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We keep hearing about Allawi and Sadr and foreign "insurgents", but nobody talks about that irrelevent old man anymore.

Except when the subject of the death penalty comes up.

Posted by: Ted at 04:15 PM | category: Square Pegs
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I'm sitting there, trying to use our universal remote to turn the volume up on the TV, and managing to do everything but. My wife is greatly amused, and I finally hand her the remote and tell her to deal with it. She does, with about four seemingly random button presses (and a dozen silent spells I'm sure).

She smiles and says, "it's not rocket science."

"Exactly, which is why I can't figure it out!"

I get up and leave the room. TV. Who needs it?

Posted by: Ted at 06:03 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Traffic was outrageously cooperative this morning, I made the Dale City to Rosslyn run in 20 minutes. The only time I had to slow was going through the Springfield mixing bowl, and slowing down meant 60mph. On top of that, it's a beautiful cool morning, so I put the windows down and cranked up the stereo.

It turned out that this morning's randomly-selected CD was perfect for the drive. Check out this lineup:

Deep Purple - Smoke On The Water
Deep Purple - Woman From Tokyo
Foghat - Fool For The City
Foghat - I Just Want To Make Love To You
Foghat - Slow Ride
Gary Wright - Dream Weaver
Gary Wright - Love Is Alive
Little Feat - Rock & Roll Doctor
Little Feat - Spanish Moon
Styx - Lady
Styx - Renegade
Uriah Heep - Sweet Loraine
Uriah Heep - The Wizard
Steely Dan - Do It Again
Steely Dan - Reelin' In The Years
Santana - Samba Pa Ti
Santana - Black Magic Woman
Santana - Oye Como Va

Now, I obviously didn't hear them all this morning. In fact, as I was pulling into the parking garage the first Gary Wright song was just coming on, which made me think of something. That disk is basically a 70's era stoner soundtrack*. I can just see it: someone scores a bag and a few friends gather 'round the bong, getting high and listening to some tunes.

I am so gonna jam on the drive home.

*For the record: I didn't smoke dope in high school, I was always the straight-but-cool friend. I keep telling y'all, I'm boring.

Posted by: Ted at 06:15 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Great play list!

Posted by: Susie at August 18, 2004 07:22 AM (CSnd4)

2 Hey, Ted, would you be insulted if I said...
Damn you're old!

Posted by: Kin at August 18, 2004 09:57 AM (t9u+J)

3 As long as it was the full 8-minute version of Slow Ride and not the chopped version 94.7 plays.

personaly, I think I would have left Styx and Steely Dan off and put on some cuts from side two of 2112.

I was heavily self-medicated back in the day.

Posted by: Rob @ L&R at August 18, 2004 10:59 AM (9B3PF)

4 Slow Ride... the first song I heard in the first bar I was ever in... Mr H's in Sunset Center, Amarillo, TX circa 1975... one of my ex-hs-football-teammates was playing college ball and one of his college teammates was working the door, so we got in the door...

Posted by: Mudfish Billie at August 18, 2004 09:54 PM (f4tF1)

5 Kin, I'd be really insulted, if I could remember what I was talking about.

Rob, you got me to thinking. I like Styx and Steely Dan a lot, but if'n not already on another disc, I'd probably replace the Styx with Jethro Tull and the Grateful Dead, and put Steely Dan's "Only A Fool Would Do That" on instead. Maybe add "Willin'" too from Little Feat.

Posted by: Ted at August 19, 2004 08:32 PM (ZjSa7)

6 Looks like I have some downloading to do. On the "Ellen" show, she asked the audience to identify Gary Wright's "other" song (other than "Dream Weaver") -- nobody could come up with it!

Posted by: dawn at August 19, 2004 09:05 PM (Zgn4s)

7 Love Is Alive is wa-a-a-ay better than Dream Weaver, imo, if only for the cool beginning.
And, yes, I'd replace Steely Dan with Jethro Tull any day! I mean, does S.D. have to use so many dang 6ths? All they are is "jazzy" 6ths! I like "Reelin' In The Years" and "Rikki, Don't Lose That Number" -- and even "Deacon Blues" -- but, jeeze, enough with the f^#&*$N 6th chords!!!

"Acres Wild", "The Mouse Police Never Sleeps", "Nursie", "Reason To Wonder", "One Brown Mouse"...

Shoot, now I gotta go grab my guitar.....

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 19, 2004 11:13 PM (3E/Ba)

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Rocket Jones the blog sucks lately. For many good reasons, including the new job. Even my recreational reading has been dominated by technical books. Ever relax to "An Introduction to SELinux"? Boy howdy, talk about riveting.

So I haven't had the time to devote online that I used to, and this site has inevitably suffered. I'm not apologizing, just stating the facts as I see 'em. I'm also not considering shutting down, I have too much fun with this.

I don't get to visit the places on my blogroll nearly as much as I used to, and that bites because I feel like I'm losing touch a little bit with good friends.

On the plus side, I've got a whole heap of fun movies to review, a surprise for some of you, and of course the whole Blogger Bowl 2004 league. The draft results are in, annika is trash talking (and we Raiders fans can talk some shit), and, well, let's just say that I've got some things in the works. Not earth-shaking stuff, but stuff.

In other words, keep checking back for continued blogging ala Rocket Jones. It may suck, but it's my suck.

Posted by: Ted at 06:22 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Jules Winnfield: Wanna know what I'm buyin' Ringo?
Pumpkin: What?
Jules Winnfield: Your life. I'm givin' you that money so I don't hafta kill your ass. You read the Bible?
Pumpkin: Not regularly.
Jules Winnfield: There's a passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin' that shit for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never really questioned what it meant. I thought it was just a cold-blooded thing to say to a motherfucker before you popped a cap in his ass. But I saw some shit this mornin' made me think twice. Now I'm thinkin': it could mean you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. .45 here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or is could by you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. I'd like that. But that shit ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin, Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.

Posted by: Anonymous Kyle...again at August 17, 2004 09:50 AM (blNMI)

2 A motto to live by--if only babel fish could translate into latin!

Posted by: Steve the Llamabutcher at August 17, 2004 01:59 PM (Q9Wgy)

3 Hooray for suckage!

Posted by: Keith at August 17, 2004 05:19 PM (jbvVc)

4 Aww...I luv ya ;-)

Posted by: Lynn at August 17, 2004 05:21 PM (eAcba)

5 Everyone's too busy to blog/read these days (except for my employers, who have suddenly managed to read every last one of my pages in the past two days). I may find myself with a LOT of time to read blogs more regularly pretty soon!

Posted by: dawn at August 19, 2004 09:08 PM (Zgn4s)

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It's been awhile since I've posted a love song to my beloved. She doesn't read Rocket Jones, but word gets back to her.

Dust On The Bottle
(David Lee Murphy/Jimbeau Hinson)

Creole Williams lived down a dirt road
Made homemade wine like nobody I know
Dropped by one Friday night and said can you help me Creole
Got a little girl waitin' on me and I wanna treat her right

I got what you need son, it's sittin down in the cellar
He reached through the cobwebs as he turned on the light and said

There might be a little dust on the bottle
But don't let it fool ya about what's inside
There might be a little dust on the bottle
It's one of those things that gets sweeter with time

She was sittin in the porch swing as I pulled up the driveway
My ole heart was racing as she climbed inside
She slid over real close and drove down to the lake road
Watched the sun fade in that big red sky

I reached under the front seat and said, now here's something special
It's just been waiting for a night like tonight

There might be a little dust on the bottle
But don't let it fool ya about what's inside
There might be a little dust on the bottle
It's one of those things that gets sweeter with time

You're still with me, and we've made some memories
After all these years theres one thing I've found
Some say good love, well it's like a fine wine
It keeps getting better as the days go by

There might be a little dust on the bottle
But don't let it fool ya about what's inside
There might be a little dust on the bottle
It's one of those things that gets sweeter with time

Posted by: Ted at 06:10 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Great song!

I'd like to have someone to sing/post a song like that to. You must be a lucky guy.

Posted by: GEBIV at August 12, 2004 08:39 PM (/xqbY)

2 What GEBIV said.

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 12, 2004 11:30 PM (8Chfh)

3 I am lucky, and I know it.

Posted by: Ted at August 13, 2004 11:45 AM (blNMI)

4 yea...dust on the bottle is an awesome song, makes me think of my special someone everytime

Posted by: justin at June 20, 2005 07:22 AM (1mnTr)

5 I love that song. It used to be my boyfriends song to me before we went our seperate ways.

Posted by: Kayla at August 02, 2005 12:49 PM (Yl0BJ)

6 I've loved that song ever since I was little!!!It jus amases me that someone could write something that awsome.

Posted by: Yama at August 29, 2005 06:29 PM (EhjnY)

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Denmark has forbidden Kellogg's from adding vitamins and minerals to the breakfast cereals sold in that country.

They claim the additions result in "toxic doses" which could harm children and unborn children. Kellogg's additions include 17% of the US recommended daily requirements calcium and iron, and 25% of vitamins B6 and folic acid. Denmark does not have recommended daily allowances of nutrients.

Rather than turn this into some dark anti-American conspiracy, I'll believe the simpler explanation. The Danish government are idiots. Probably not enough vitamins in their diet growing up.

Posted by: Ted at 06:08 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Yesterday I had a complete physical because I'll be 45 years old soon. My last checkup happened when I turned 40, and isn't what the title of this post is about. According to the official doctor scale, I am now under 300 pounds and have lost 40 pounds since the first of the year. I'd hit that plateau and hadn't lost anything for a while, but just kept up the diet and it looks like I'm dropping the pounds again. The doctor agreed with me when I said my goal is 220, which is higher than the 'recommended' but reasonable for my build.

As for my condition, I am disgustingly healthy despite myself, with good blood pressure. Blood work will be done saturday at the lab, mainly for a diabetes check, count the cholesterol (should be fine), and whatever else they look for (mad cow?).

Here's a tip for you Bill: find a pretty lady doctor with small hands. That part of the exam isn't any more fun than before, but you can pretend it's foreplay.

Posted by: Ted at 05:38 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Everyone, and I mean both sides, claim the media is biased against them. Gee, I wonder whatever could they mean?

Check out this headline from the AP:

AP: U.S. Didn't Warn Las Vegas of Threats

Wow. Reading on:

When the Justice Department obtained two videos suggesting terrorists had cased Las Vegas casinos, the discussions didn't center on public alerts or heightened security. Rather, authorities worried about the effects on tourism and the casinos' legal liabilities, internal memos show.

There's more!

Though the FBI offered, most local law enforcement and casino security officers declined an invitation to view the footage after it was obtained in 2002

One document obtained by The Associated Press quotes a federal prosecutor in Las Vegas as saying the city's mayor was concerned about the "deleterious effect on the Las Vegas tourism industry" if the evidence became public. The mayor said Monday he was never told of the footage.

Another memo states the casinos didn't want to see the footage for fear it would make them more likely to be held liable in civil court if an attack occurred.

Posted by: Ted at 07:36 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Woo Hoo, a fisking from Ted!!

Tourism vs Safety is a hard wire to walk when things aren't all that clear. I'm not sure I'd come down so hard on the, basically, foggy. Then again, y' don't wanna look like Larry Vaughn: Mayor of Shark City.

(Yeah, yeah, all my worldview is filtered through the shootimg script of JAWS, I know...)

Posted by: Tuning Spork at August 10, 2004 10:42 PM (LaDCa)

2 I'm not much of a fisker. My first attempt (long long ago) was pretty embarrassing. This one just pissed me off because it was so blatent.

Posted by: Ted at August 11, 2004 06:24 AM (blNMI)

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Passed on peacefully at age 96. She made over 100 movies in her career, but was most famous for her role in King Kong, where the mighty ape carried her to the top of the Empire State Building in New York City.

In tribute, the lights on the spire of the Empire State Building will be dimmed tonight.

Posted by: Ted at 06:07 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I'm still dragging tail-feathers after the last week, but last night I made a list of things I needed to take care of today.

This morning as I was stripping the beds to wash the linens, I found that one of the dogs (and I know exactly which one) peed on my pillow sometime after I'd gotten up. I assume he's showing his displeasure with me about the long hours of being left alone all week. The family is out of town, and I've been leaving early and coming home late during the rocket launch.

So I grabbed the dog and rubbed his face in it, then tossed him outside. Downstairs in the pantry was another puddle, so I had to do it again. At one point, I walked into the kitchen to check something off of my to-do list and stepped in another wet spot.

That did it, stronger measures were called for. One of the things on my list was to change the water in the dog bowl, but what I actually wrote was "water dogs". What a wonderful idea.

So I grabbed both dogs, took them out front and turned the hose on 'em, which they hate. Soaked 'em both really good, then left them to sit outside and think about it.

An hour later I let them back in one at a time, meeting them at the door with a towel and another stern talking-to. They've been on their best behavior since.

Posted by: Ted at 11:59 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Very. Toon.

(in the extended entry) more...

Posted by: Ted at 10:48 AM | category: Square Pegs
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