September 26, 2005
Prom or Halloween, the versatility is breathtaking
In the extended entry (
warning - indelicate language)
more...
Posted by: Ted at
06:42 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Oh my. I'm reminded of a certain double-date that Tex and I went on back in our college days.
Posted by: Tuning Spork at September 26, 2005 06:55 PM (1r3oR)
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Speaking of pluggin' butts.....is this the Jeffry Dahmer fan club?
During his trial the Judge askeed Jeffrery Dahmer;"Why did you do it?"
Jeff replied;"Your honor,a sandwich is a sandwich......but a Manwhich is more like a meal!"HAHAHA!!!!!!!
Posted by: Russ at September 26, 2005 10:31 PM (ObxzR)
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** quickly scribbling venn diagrams **
I'd do the one on the left.
Posted by: buckethead at September 27, 2005 09:48 AM (ztNrs)
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You've got to applaud a practical application of the balance that exists in nature.
Posted by: CGHill at September 27, 2005 11:51 AM (wmpjK)
Posted by: buckethead at September 28, 2005 02:36 PM (ztNrs)
6
Not sure, probably some "funny t-shirt" series on a newsgroup.
Posted by: Ted at September 28, 2005 02:43 PM (blNMI)
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Does this make me a bad Republican?
I only eat ketchup on two things: tater tots and grilled cheese sandwiches.
Posted by: Ted at
05:30 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Only if you eat with your left hand.
Posted by: Stephen Macklin at September 26, 2005 05:46 PM (ics4u)
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I don't think so.
I eat Kechup in my Mac & Cheese, but at least I gave it up, putting it on steak......
Posted by: Blogeline at September 27, 2005 07:50 AM (YMz4J)
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That depends. Is it Heinz-Kerry ketchup?
Posted by: triticale at September 27, 2005 08:33 AM (96P4G)
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I can understand it on tater tots--but ketchup on grilled cheese...? YUCK!
Mayo. Gobs of it. The REAL kind, not that hideous Miracle Whip crap.
--TwoDragons
Posted by: Denita TwoDragons at September 27, 2005 09:33 AM (cYpnI)
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I like mayo (or better yet, tarter sauce) on my french fries--does that make me Canadian?
Posted by: Susie at September 28, 2005 10:30 AM (a0oF7)
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Susie, with mayo is how the Germans eat pommes frites. Tarter sauce sounds good.
Denita, I like mayo, even on a cheese sandwich, but not grilled cheese. Yuck!
Posted by: Ted at September 28, 2005 10:53 AM (blNMI)
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September 24, 2005
Why cable was invented
Posted by: Ted at
10:23 AM | category: Square Pegs
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September 23, 2005
Hey, look who's in town! KILL HIM!!!!
I was watching the Weather Channel coverage of Hurricane Rita, and they've got a reporter located in Sulphur, Louisiana. He was saying that the eye would pass right over or just to the west of them, and another reporter mentioned that the guy was "four for four" this season.
Four hurricanes, four assignments, four times he's been right near where the eye comes ashore.
If Jeff Morrow ever visits your town, get the hell out.
Posted by: Ted at
10:02 PM | category: Square Pegs
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I'm not an economist
And thank goodness I'm not! Otherwise, folks would be bugging me to explain the goofy gas prices around here.
This morning, my wife called me on her way to work to let me know that a certain gas station in our area was priced at $2.54 a gallon. Across the street is another station that we occasionally use, priced at $2.59. Anticipating a rise in prices, I gassed up the truck at the cheaper place.
This afternoon my wife noticed that the first place had raised prices by a penny, to $2.55 a gallon. Meanwhile, all the way across the street, the other place jumped prices by twenty cents.
I haven't a clue. Maybe their distributor is sticking it to them and they're just passing along the price increase. I can believe that because their prices are insanely volatile compared to most brands in the area, and they're not always more expensive than everywhere else. But if they're trying to take advantage, they're the dumbest businessmen on the planet, because people remember stuff like that, and I'll bet that even when prices stabilize again their business will be down.
We tend to have cheap gas in this area compared to most. What's a gallon going for in your burg?
Posted by: Ted at
08:03 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Regular topped $3 recently, but came down in the past week to anywhere between $2.60 & $2.85ish. Premium is still above $3 at most stations.
Posted by: Tuning Spork at September 23, 2005 08:12 PM (wza9/)
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What a station charges typically depends on the gas they bought. The pricey station probably just got a delivery of more expensive gas.
The cheaper guy across the street will do a bombing business and very soon will need to refill his tanks and his price will go up too.
Posted by: Stephen Macklin at September 23, 2005 08:41 PM (ics4u)
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$2.85 for regular unleaded
Posted by: derek at September 24, 2005 08:54 AM (iY1/W)
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I fixate on a few foreign countries' prices as part of an elaborate, healthy, denial system. Lately it's going for $7/gal in Barcelona, and about $5/gal in India.
Posted by: dogette at September 24, 2005 11:12 AM (2bayr)
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$2.599 (a little on the high side for this town, but it was convenient) yesterday.
Posted by: CGHill at September 24, 2005 12:45 PM (tEfsQ)
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Her ya go.Just punch in yer zip for local gas prices.
http://autos.msn.com/everyday/gasstations.aspx?zip=22630&src=LeftNav
Posted by: Russ at September 25, 2005 01:34 AM (ObxzR)
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Teefs
Had a minor dental emergency a couple of days ago that required a trip to see the dentist. I'm pleased to announce (as if anyone cares) that *my* dentist is back from maternity leave and I'm very very happy about that.
So anyways, things went good yesterday and I have a quick followup scheduled for this morning, after which I'll go in to work late and probably stay busy there until this evening (end of the fiscal year coming up fast, don't'cha know). I'll see y'all tomorrow, most likely.
If you see a guy with only half his face working, and a big string of bloody drool hanging off his chin, say hi. It ain't me, but he's probably having a bad day and could use a kind word.
Posted by: Ted at
07:47 AM | category: Square Pegs
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If you see a guy with only half his face working, and a big string of bloody drool hanging off his chin, say hi.
Whaddaya mean, "say hi?" Are you INSANE? Are you MENTALLY DERANGED!?!?!? AIM FOR THE HEAD! THE ZOMBIE INVASION HAS STARTED!!!
Posted by: Victor at September 23, 2005 08:58 AM (L3qPK)
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I feel your pain.
I have do go to thedentist on Monday, but unlike you I will take the whole day of and enjoy a loooong weekend.
Oh, BTW, I love your new banner.....
Posted by: Blogeline at September 23, 2005 10:30 AM (YMz4J)
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I feel your discomfort. After 5 weeks of regular dental visits, I hope not to see my dentist again for many, many years. :-)
As for the bloody drool - EWWWWWWWW.
Posted by: Cindy at September 23, 2005 01:50 PM (vg5qz)
4
Careful, there. Being just back from maternity leave, your dentist may have a grudge with men to settle -- and she'll have the pointy objects.
Posted by: Tuning Spork at September 23, 2005 08:16 PM (wza9/)
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September 20, 2005
New Banner
What'cha think?
Posted by: Ted at
06:37 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Posted by: Stephen Macklin at September 20, 2005 06:59 PM (ics4u)
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Now come on Stephen... Those can't possibly be Ted's legs...
Posted by: Tim at September 20, 2005 08:11 PM (bw/kd)
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You realize, of course, that you've set yourself an impossibly-high standard there.
Posted by: CGHill at September 20, 2005 08:42 PM (tEfsQ)
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I like.
If you could somehow add this into a Werner Von Braun image it would be even better.
Posted by: The Maximum Leader at September 20, 2005 09:21 PM (zHoql)
Posted by: JohnL at September 21, 2005 02:51 PM (YVul2)
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Legs and a haystack. What's not to love?
Posted by: Tuning Spork at September 21, 2005 08:02 PM (gGUnj)
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so, your a leg man?
BTW, you're dating yourself w/the cyd charisse reference.
Posted by: michele at September 22, 2005 09:17 AM (0cwiO)
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No, actually I'm a butt man, but I can appreciate a good pair either north or south from there.
Dating myself? I'm timeless. Besides, I love old movies, so who's to say I don't know her from late night TV?
Posted by: Ted at September 22, 2005 10:58 AM (blNMI)
9
Your birthday girl kicks the crap out of this one Ted. But then, that's just the me talking.
Posted by: shank at September 22, 2005 10:49 PM (jfEhX)
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Work Conversation*
Supervisor: What happened at the meeting?
Me: Bullshit.
Supervisor: No, really, I need more than that. Didn't you take notes?
Me (handing over a page and a half of meeting notes): Read for yourself.
Supervisor (reading carefully): What bullshit.
Me: Echo Echo.
*I made this up. Think of it as a composite of the last 100 meetings I've been to.
Posted by: Ted at
06:18 PM | category: Square Pegs
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You mean, we're not really supposed to say that out loud?? Damn, guess that explains the little 'career plateau' I seem to be at. Attitude problem my ass! I'm just keepin' it reeeeeeeeal!
Posted by: shank at September 22, 2005 10:50 PM (jfEhX)
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September 19, 2005
Happy Talk Like A Pirate Day!
In today's society we hear often about inclusion, so with that in mind, I'd like everyone to join me in song:
Kum-bah-yArrrr, me mateys! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Kum-bah-yArrrr, me mateys! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Kum-bah-yArrrr, me mateys! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Keel-haul the sinners, mates! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Keel-haul the sinners, mates! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Keel-haul the sinners, mates! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
There the beastie be! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
There the beastie be! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
There the beastie be! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
I'm sure a fine crew such as yourselves can add a verse to the tune, no?
Posted by: Ted at
04:23 AM | category: Square Pegs
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A hogshead of grog, me buckos! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
A hogshead of grog, me buckos! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
A hogshead of grog, me buckos! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Grapple yon pinnace, me wench! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Grapple yon pinnace, me wench! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Grapple yon pinnace, me wench! Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrrr!
Posted by: schirmdog at September 19, 2005 12:20 PM (zkvIv)
2
Avast, ye scurvy tars! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Avast, ye scurvy tars! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Avast, ye scurvy tars! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Strike the mizzen sail! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Strike the mizzen sail! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Strike the mizzen sail! Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Shiver me timbers, Kum-bah-yArrrr!
Posted by: Elisson at September 26, 2005 01:31 PM (KyeL/)
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September 17, 2005
Fractions of a million served!
Hey, sometime last night
Rocket Jones got its 250,000th visitor!!!
Kind of amazing, considering posts like the one above, eh?
Posted by: Ted at
10:03 AM | category: Square Pegs
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September 16, 2005
Don't even bother denying it
Ignore the brilliant comedy for the moment and admit it, this brash and brassy redhead had some genuinely fine gams.

(click for super vitameatavegemin size)
Posted by: Ted at
06:08 AM | category: Square Pegs
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September 15, 2005
Reminder
September 19th is
Talk Like A Pirate Day! Arrrr, ye scurvy dogs.
I be thinking of ordering one of these for meself.

Yo ho! Yo ho! A pirates life for me...
Posted by: Ted at
07:15 AM | category: Square Pegs
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September 14, 2005
Dear Mr. SUV,
I'm sorry that it now costs you $180.00 every time you need to fill your gas tank, but that's the consequence of your decision to buy that oversized off-road vehicle for your daily commute on the interstate.
Just like your attempt to improve your gas milage by accellerating from zero to sixty in 6.3 weeks has a consequence - the rest of us think you're an asshole.
And get the hell out of the fast lane if you won't do at least the speed limit. Owning that monster makes you special all right, but 'special' has taken on a whole new meaning.
Posted by: Ted at
06:06 AM | category: Square Pegs
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"Stop eating the paste" special?
Posted by: Rob@L&R at September 14, 2005 06:59 AM (281T8)
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Sorry Ted but I gotta disagree with ya on this one.The bigger and badder the better.My hot rods and monster trucks fall into the same class a my guns.I own them because I'm an American living in America and if I want one I'll damb well own it.I don't have to need it for any reason.Just wanting and desiring it is reason enough to own it.
Gas milage?Pollution?Like I said before if they where to legalize hemp production we would all be driving on methanol for about 10 cents a gallon.Anyone who's not lobbying their leaders for just that have no room to gripe.Other alt fuels are not out of the question either.
I do,however,agree with yer thoughts on the speed limit though.Don't get me started on that.One thing I despise are people who don't get the concept of Slow Traffic Keep Right or that the Left lane is the PASSING! lane.
Now as far as other peoples reasons for owning a monster truck I reckon there are many.People who own them for the reasons I stated above I can respect.People who are like me and have been raised around big,powerful machines all of their life and who consider them a part of their culture I respect.Believe it or not I was once considering buying a fully restored B-56 single axle Mack truck just to cruise around in.People who own them because they feel safer I am mixed about.On one hand you are overall and all other things being equal safer in a larger vehicle when in a crash with a smaller vehicle.But on the other hand perhaps some of those people are just too paranoid and should maybe just go to defensive driving school and then buy or borrow a set of nads and get over it.
This brings us to another breed of owner.These are the one's who own SUVs for the feeling of power that that they need to feel over others by driving something that allows them to look down at and to tower over others.There are many sub catagories of this driver.There's the "I drive a big vehicle because it draws attention from my small weiner"type.Then there's the mid life crisis type which is usually a guy.These are the types that often show up at our Mopar shows in their Vipers and try to impress us with their check writing prowess.Not!
Posted by: Russ at September 14, 2005 09:09 AM (ObxzR)
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It ain't a lot better these days, but if they'd get diesel engines, they wouldn't have to fill that huge tank very often... Course they wouldn't win the hole shot, but, I can tell you that my truck has plenty of get up and go... Not to mention it sounds like what a truck should sound like...
(and as a side benifit, I just love pulling up someplace fancy and offending all the rich people there with the noise and smell)
Posted by: Tim at September 14, 2005 09:30 AM (7FZTC)
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Russ, you misunderstood my point (partially anyway). I don't care that they own and drive these big-assed SUV's. I mind that now that gas costs have soared they've started driving like grannies in an effort to save gas. Be a turtle all you want, just do it in the rightmost lane.
And I hate the whining about gas prices. We're all paying it, from those who drive little matchbox cars to the monster truckers.
Posted by: Ted at September 14, 2005 10:20 AM (blNMI)
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Don't worry Ted.I knew your point exactly.I just thought it was a good excuse to speak my mind on the subject as well as to throw in a good word for the ol' monster trucks.Woooo Hoooo!!!!!
Posted by: Russ at September 14, 2005 12:14 PM (ObxzR)
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Quotable
From the
Ottawa Citizen (via
Cream of the Crock):
That is not to say government has not failed. (Celebrities also underperformed, and Sean Penn should probably resign.)
Lots of good stuff to read at the Crock.
Posted by: Ted at
05:20 AM | category: Square Pegs
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September 12, 2005
They should probably move on to "Plan B"
According to Vincent Creel, spokesman for Biloxi, Mississippi Mayor A.J. Holloway:
"A whole new market, people who had been looking at Florida to retire, were going to come here to escape the hurricanes."
Katrina is a short-term setback. They'll be fine in the long run.
Posted by: Ted at
11:31 AM | category: Square Pegs
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So I see this guy...
...and he's tall and skinny as a rail, and he has this enormous Yosemite Sam moustache. It looked like someone had duct taped a pekinese to one end of a popsicle stick.
Posted by: Ted at
05:45 AM | category: Square Pegs
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You vile jerk--couldn't you have posted a spew warning? Now I have laundry to do. Dang.
;-)
--TwoDragons
Posted by: Denita TwoDragons at September 12, 2005 01:55 PM (uLpok)
2
Wouldn't it be presumptious to post my own warnings?
Glad I gotcha though. LOL
Posted by: Ted at September 12, 2005 04:03 PM (+OVgL)
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Quotable
TV analyst Randy Cross said this about Denver quarterback Jake Plummer:
"Plummer is the Billy Graham of the NFL. He can make 70,000 people say 'Jesus' in unison."
LMAO
Posted by: Ted at
04:20 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I wasn't saying that...It was more along the lines of:...
well, in hindsight, I can't really share what I was saying.
Painful. so very painful.
Posted by: Derek at September 12, 2005 10:54 AM (FloaD)
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I liked watching Plummer play in Arizona. I *love* seeing him play in Denver. Of course, I'm speaking as a Raiders fan.
Posted by: Ted at September 12, 2005 11:35 AM (blNMI)
3
Let's see...Jake the "Snake", Plumbers use snakes to unclog sewer lines...evidently he's in line for a new profession?!
Posted by: schirmdog at September 12, 2005 02:24 PM (zkvIv)
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September 11, 2005
Timing is everything when it comes to gas prices
I filled up yesterday after work and paid $2.99 a gallon.
This morning as I passed the gas stations on the way to the rocket launch, the prices were all $2.89 a gallon. Dang.
Posted by: Ted at
06:52 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Dont you miss the days where you and mom would complain about the
outrageous gas prices of anything over a dollar.
*snickers*
Posted by: Mookie at September 11, 2005 08:29 PM (DqTfF)
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September 10, 2005
I don't normally hold a grudge, but...
I just thought of the perfect line to use next time Sears calls me:
The only reason I'd ever set foot in a Sears again is if my house is underwater and I need someplace to loot.
I'd probably preface that with a "Ma'am", 'cause I'm a gentleman like that.
Posted by: Ted at
05:14 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Tell 'em you know a blogger in S.Fl who feels the same way. GRRR.
Posted by: Bou at September 10, 2005 09:12 PM (5JHEt)
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Mookie News
Rachael got her work/study assignment. She's working for the Drama Department, mostly at the campus theater.
That's like asking a mermaid to be a lifeguard.
Posted by: Ted at
08:31 AM | category: Square Pegs
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