I have my Windows installation set up to check for updates and let me know when new ones are available. I don't let it do automatic updates.

This evening I finally got around to looking at the update that had been sitting there for a couple of days. A helpful text box popped up explaining that this latest oh-so-very important update would scan my computer and if my copy of Windows was bootlegged, then a friendly message would appear periodically to remind me to upgrade to legal software.

Now if I have a legal version of Windows installed (I do), why would I need it? And if it's a bootlegged copy, why would I let you install an update to annoy me about it? I guess they're going after the dishonest *and* stoopid people out there.

No thanks. Cancel install.

Posted by: Ted at 08:24 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Woke up this morning to find a tick buried in my arm.

Posted by: Ted at 05:59 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Paraphrasing a radio commercial I heard this morning on the radio:

An important piece of the news that lets you understand the whole story, that's information. At Washington Post Radio, we only give you what you need to know, to understand the world around you.

No pretense there. They'll tell you everything you need to know. Too many supposedly well-informed people get all their "information" from one source, because it's easier and faster than dealing with contrasting viewpoints or hearing both sides of a story. That thinking stuff is hard.

Posted by: Ted at 05:13 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Rachael: You need a polka dot tie. Polka dots are in.

Dad: I do have a polka dot tie, but the dots are very small.

Rachael: How big doesn't matter, just the fact that they're there.

Dad: Kind of like a penis.

Rachael: Growing up in this house has already psychologically scarred me, you can stop now.

Posted by: Ted at 05:05 AM | category: Square Pegs
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No matter, the universe is in balance.

Daughter Robyn came home for the weekend yesterday and brought along her new dog, Army (short for Armando). That makes three dogs running around, which matches the current number of rabbits in the house (Fred, Java and Ozzie). Now that Rachael is on her way home for the weekend, I will have all three kids underfoot as well.

Three. Three. Three. Half the number of the beast. Satan light.

Posted by: Ted at 05:59 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Mu.Nu has been swamped the last couple of days with comment spam, which means that our filters have been working overtime to defend the virtual ramparts. Unfortunately, this means that quite a few of you have been unable to leave comments, and I appreciate the emails I've gotten with feedback and letting me know that there's a problem. My apologies for the frustration, and know that we're just as sick of it as you are.

Minx will be up and running soon, beta test-wise, and I've been working on a new XML <Electrocute Spammer> tag, but it's not quite functional yet.

Posted by: Ted at 05:20 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I feel sympathy for those folks who are starting to lose their homes because they took out adjustable mortgages. That's a bad situation to be in. I just didn't realize that they were all stupid. I figured that they had gambled that rates would stay low, and lost that bet. Or maybe they miscalculated just how much rates would rise and how it would affect their ability to pay.

Today I heard a news report that actually told me that these poor people were in the position they are because they didn't understand how an adjustable mortgage worked.

So these unfortunate borrowers - who, by the way, initiated contact with these evil lending institutions - were forced to sign enormous documents in multiple places in the presence of lawyers without anyone making an effort to explain what the conditions were in order to borrow tens or even hundreds of thousands of dollars.

See what I mean? These folks were stupid! They didn't know enough to ask questions. They didn't *understand*! They're victims.

Like I said, I feel sorry for them because it's a lousy situation to be in. But not sorry enough to think we (as in the taxpayers) should bail them out. And if their credit is ruined for a while, then maybe it's better that way because they're obviously not ready to play with the adults in the real financial world.

Update: Over at Wizbang!, new contributor Jayson Javitz provides an insider's look at the looming "Mortgage Tsunami". It's worth checking out.

Posted by: Ted at 04:57 AM | category: Square Pegs
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When the World Trade Center collapsed, not quite 3,000 people died. That's a big number, but not really inconceivably big*. It's human nature to generalize when the scope of death is that big. It's easier to get our minds around it when the numbers are rationalized into "a whole lot". But by doing that we collectively dull the pain and outrage by reducing it to a statistic.

Benton City, Washington. Population 2,790.

Could you make the decision to kill every man, woman and child in that town? The terrorists on 9/11 made just such a choice.

The victims that day weren't all American citizens. They came from more than a score of countries. They all contributed in their own way to the modern world, from the executives in the boardrooms to the illegal alien bussing tables in the restaraunts.** They shared one trait, they were collectively hated because of where they lived and worked.

Holden, Maine. Population 2,827.

Can you even conceive of something that would make you so angry that you would be willing to murder thousands? Not thousands of soldiers or another group of people who've wronged you, just several thousand randomly selected innocent targets.

Sedgewick County, Colorado. Population 2,747.

Imagine waking up one morning knowing that you were going to commit mass murder. How perverted is your worldview to even allow consideration of such an act?

The people who died in the attacks that day represented many varied belief systems and religions, and no doubt more than a few were followers of Islam. Not that it mattered, because the object was mass destruction and death, and the who that died mattered less than the why of it to the terrorists.

Today, followers of that same perverted vision of religion are intentionally murdering civilians in Iraq. Somehow, it's gotten all turned around that it's America's fault. If you can, please explain to me how anything America has ever done can make it morally acceptable to choose to walk into a crowded public place and detonate explosives strapped to your body.

And if those numbers are too large and impersonal for you, how about the latest car bombing in Iraq, where terrorists detonated a car bomb with two children inside it. The children were there to lure the checkpoint soldiers into letting their guard down.

Godless, subhuman savages. Anyone who believes that it is possible to negotiate with such as that is a fool. The terrorists have been clear about what they want, and you can make the choice for yourself. You can choose to live under their twisted form of slavery, or you can fight and keep fighting so that you and your children can live as free people. You cannot choose compromise, because the terrorists do not recognize the possibility.

* That number seems even less threatening considering the number of dead in the last tsunami, but that natural event points out that on our worst days, mankind is a piker compared to what Mother Nature can do to us.

** I guess the politically correct term would be "undocumented immigrants" but "illegal aliens" is more technically correct. There are substantiated reports that at least a few lost their lives that day. I mourn for them as I do for everyone who died in the attacks, but I'm not going to sugarcoat their legal status.

Posted by: Ted at 04:54 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Y'all might want to re-read the chapters of my story, "Zombies of Autumn", just to refresh your memory of what's already been posted.

Just sayin'.

Posted by: Ted at 05:29 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Why is it that when I want onion rings with real onion "rings" inside I have to buy gourmet-style? If you buy regular onion rings, they're ring-shaped breaded minced onion.

Chip in with your examples.

Posted by: Ted at 05:45 AM | category: Square Pegs
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1 Actual onion rings are a dying breed, friend. There's a joint not far from where I live that still sells the best rings ever, though...Wonderfully crisp breading coating actual rings of sweet onion...If they ever go to the minced version, I shall officially declare this civilization declined.

Posted by: Derek at March 15, 2007 10:49 AM (FloaD)

2 Eh. How 'bout one of those big shiny deep-fried appetizer onion-flower things they sell at places Outback Steakhouse? I know, I know, they aren't RINGS. Hell, they probably aren't even actual onion. They're made out of simulated onion, uhh, a more economical substance found in the desert: yucca shards. Hence the upright posture or "bloom." But you dip the shards in enough of that horse-radishy sauce and I mean, who cares?

Posted by: dogette at March 16, 2007 12:23 PM (q/UVc)

3 The inventor of those recently died in, like, the last two months.

Now, before you start saying "Good!" and other less-than-nice things about the recently departed, keep in mind this person was the father or grandfather (I've forgotten which) of one of my gf's friends (which is how I know about his passing).

Also remember: If you even *think* less-than-nice things about the recently departed...Karma Is A Bitch.

Posted by: Victor at March 16, 2007 02:01 PM (1oGDT)

4 The inventor of onion rings? Or those bloomin' onion things?

Don't matter, I like deep fried onion.

Posted by: Ted at March 16, 2007 06:14 PM (+OVgL)

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Did you know that they make synthetic saliva? My wife Liz recently started using it on her doctor's recommendation because one of her new medications just sucks the moisture out of her mouth.

Saliva is a vital component of such everyday processes as tasting, swallowing, speech and digestion, and its absence is what leads to dry mouth. A reduction in salivary flow can occur for a number of reasons, but medication use is a key contributor.

Of course, in our family we call it "pseudo-drool" or just "fake spit".

(mental note: brownie-flavored saliva for dopers...niche market but has potential)

Posted by: Ted at 05:14 AM | category: SciTech
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Posted by: Ted at 05:31 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Anton, not Pavel.

Posted by: Ted at 05:00 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I've been fighting a cold for almost a week now. Tomorrow I *have* to be at work, so I called in today to get some much-needed rest. Mmmmmmm... Nyquil.

Posted by: Ted at 09:16 AM | category: Square Pegs
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I cringe when I hear about people who are "writing the last chapters of their lives" or similar sentiments.

Bullshit.

I don't care how old I get, my life story (like anyone would ever actually write it, let alone read it) would be going along great guns and then abruptly end in mid-sentence.

Because if yours doesn't, then you wasted at least some of the precious gift that life is. Or even worse, you gave up too soon.

Posted by: Ted at 08:22 AM | category: Square Pegs
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Someone, somewhere along the line, seriously screwed up with my laptop. I took it in to the repair shop today because it no longer recognized the CD-ROM drive. I should get it back, good as new, in two weeks.

The warrantee doesn't expire for another month and a half.

Posted by: Ted at 08:28 PM | category: Square Pegs
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Although the forecast has been changing constantly for the last couple of days, what was supposed to be sleet and rain turned into over four inches of wet, heavy snow.

Power was out for not quite two hours (I took a nap), and it looks like it's warming up a little bit now. Not a good thing, if it all re-freezes overnight. Tomorrow morning is looking to be a lovely commute.

Posted by: Ted at 02:49 PM | category: Square Pegs
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1 We're looking at 2-4 inches of snow overnight with an additional 1-3 forecast for Monday.

Last week was school vacation and it looks like they're going to get an extra day.

Posted by: Stephen Macklin at February 25, 2007 04:31 PM (Z3kjO)

2 Ted, the wet heavy kind makes the best snowballs (for knocking people out with) and ramps (for sledding into midair with). Don't look at it as a problem, it's merely an opportunity for improvement.

Posted by: shank at February 25, 2007 05:26 PM (LDIDK)

3 Don't worry Ted,all of those global warming computer models are still accurate though.Ha!
Anyhow,don't feel bad `cause we got well over a foot.That's on top of the 2-3 inches of compacted,rock hard sleet still left in most places around here.Tonights forcast says a possibiltiy of a repeat of the whole thing on Thursday-Friday,but most likely just rain.

Posted by: Russ at February 25, 2007 11:47 PM (ix4On)

4 Hey...We didn't get snow but we got some pretty cool thunderstorms

Posted by: Robyn at February 26, 2007 01:07 AM (b4vLn)

5 It's Mrs. Rocket Jones here. While Mr. Jones is shoveling himself out of ice and snow, Rachael and I are enjoying 65 degrees and beautiful sunny skies at our ocean front hotel in Myrtle Beach. Sorry honey, wish you were here!!!

Posted by: "the wife" at February 26, 2007 09:53 AM (SdJfj)

6 Heck, forget about Mr. Jones, I wish I was there!

Posted by: Michele at February 26, 2007 12:42 PM (0cwiO)

7 Weird...Ted didn't sound that upset when he called me to tell me he had the Swedish Bikini Team over there to keep him entertained...

Posted by: Victor at February 26, 2007 12:44 PM (1oGDT)

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Last night my beloved San Jose Sharks were in town to play the Washington Capitals. You may recall that my wife had gotten us a pair of tickets for the game and gave them to me as a Christmas present (quite kick-ass, I must say).

In the extended entry is the low-down on the evening, for those so inclined to read all about it. But here I'd like to point out the odd coincidence that of the last three hockey games I've gone to, each has gone to overtime and then a shootout, and each time the team I wanted to win did just that.

If you'd like me to attend a hockey game for your favorite team, I'm sure we can arrange something. more...

Posted by: Ted at 11:32 AM | category: Square Pegs
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This morning in the parking garage, I'm walking towards my exit when a young man in a little car pulls into an open space in front of me. I don't know if he's showing off or what, but he hits the gas halfway into his turn and smacks head-on into the concrete wall behind the parking slot.

I asked him if he was all right and got glared at for my trouble. I was tempted to ask him where his mental handicap hang tag was.

Posted by: Ted at 05:44 AM | category: Square Pegs
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This morning on radio traffic, I heard about an exploding manhole that had traffic blocked downtown. This is unusual for two reasons. First, this normally happens in Georgetown, not downtown proper, and secondly it's too early in the season for exploding manholes. This isn't supposed to start until springtime.

I've never heard of such a thing happening in any other city. Is this just a local phenomenom?

Update: Rob, over at Left & Right, is the man to see about DC's 'sploding manholes.

Posted by: Ted at 05:50 AM | category: Square Pegs
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